#as if he was reflecting himself on Xiao it felt

[reginrokkr]

Late night thoughts before going to sneep here, but it just crossed my mind that Dain may resonate with Wanderer's sense of otherness as he did with Ganyu when he let on that he understands her feeling of being surrounded by people but alone at the same time. While Dain does not lack a heart as far as we know so far, I'm one to think that he understands the feeling of being something that most of the people are, but at the same time not. In my portrayal specifically, I touch sometimes on his identity struggles because he thinks of himself a monster which is cursed by the gods and corrupted at that and that he's a celestial envoy— which leads to the question what am I exactly.

[elixrr]

“I might be in love with you.”

How they realized they were in love.

ft. Xiao, Wanderer

Xiao：

When you held him amidst his karma.

The most interesting part of the tale? You weren't there. But he saw you. Even through the fights with himself and the surrounding darkness, he saw you— the way your sleeves fell loose on your shoulders, the way your feet glided along a garden of lilies and the way the silk and linen of your clothes weaved around your body. Even when he felt his body shatter in vigorous pain, Xiao saw the luminous glow of the moonlight reflecting off of your skin. The scenery of the dark, star-filled sky with the vibrant glaze lilies surrounding you had crafted such a beautiful picture in Xiao's head that, when he snapped back to reality, he could no longer feel the hurt. There was simply you. He couldn't see you, but he thought of you, and, even with his loyalty to Rex Lapis, he still smiled, thanking you for saving him from his karmic outburst.

But, wait a minute.

You weren't even there? How did you save him? Xiao pondered back on the image he created in his mind. It definitely wasn't something he saw, and it definitely isn't something happening now. It is night, but it is far too dark. The vibrancy of the moonlight is not present, and the bright, shining stars are instead clouded by fog and translucent mist. He definitely couldn't picture you outside right now, especially at this hour.

Hold on. What if you really were out? He is on Wuwang Hill, so of course it's foggy. What if it was brighter for you? What if the moonlight found its way to you instead?

What if that vision of you was real?

Without a second thought or consideration for his duties, he teleported to the balcony of Wangshu Inn, where he could have the possibility of seeing you, and indeed, he did see you. He teleported to a tree that stood by you, leaning on it. The remaining pain of the karma seemed to whisk away, yet his heart beat hastened. Something about how you brushed your finger against the bulb of a sweet flower made him smile.

“Xiao?” You whispered, and he swore he could feel the sun rioting the moon and rising amidst the darkness of the night.

“You called?”

“Oh!” You nearly jumped out of your skin. “That was unexpected. You actually came!”

“Of course I did. I made a promise to you, and I will honor it.”

A smile fell upon your face, and Xiao froze in place.

“Especially because it's me, I presume?”

“Wh—” Roses blossomed on his cheeks, and his heart exploded into petals.

“I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I wanted to ask if you'd be willing to walk home with me? I haven't seen you in a while, so maybe we could catch up?”

“Uh–m, I— Sure. That would be... Quite nice.”

“Oh, wow, you actually said yes!” You cheered, and Xiao's eyes glistened. It was perfect, this moment, because the clouds dispersed, and the stars and moon finally found themselves visible, shining through the clouds. You've conquered the spotlight tonight, and you've conquered Xiao's world, even if he couldn't tell.

But, you extended your hand to Xiao. This was just like his illustration of you from earlier, but he was now included. The moonlight reflected on your skin, your clothes weaved magically across your body, and surrounding the two of you were a field of flowers.

Xiao, without much thinking, grasped your hand tight, and you held it, too.

He felt a bloom in his heart, and the world around him brightened. Even as you were talking, he couldn’t pay attention to a word you said. You were graceful, and he felt the strangeness in the way your fingers interlocked with his.

You weren't holding him, really, but you held him somehow. In fact, you stole him away from the old world he lived in, introducing him to something new, something unique.

And in that moment, somewhere in the combination of his mind and heart swelled, sweeping in to tell him and make him realize that he was in love.

That he was in love with you.

Wanderer：

When you fell ill for the sake of him.

Kuni remembers it. His birthday came soon, and because it never snowed in Sumeru, the flowers still found themselves vibrant. Though, something in him found you to be more colorful and much more appealing to look at than a few colored petals and a stem, yet he could never bring himself to admit it; his pride would shatter and you would become giddy, and— if there was finally a heart to replace his hollow body— he would feel a twinge in his chest and an ache in the hollow shell of himself. Kuni figures that, because he has no heart, he is therefore heartless, meaning that this twinge in his chest can not be love like Nahida had suggested time and time again. Rather, this ache symbolized a feel of annoyance. After all, if he did have a heart, how would he be able to mercilessly kill so many people and commit so many sins?

Yet, he would catch you again and again, plucking the most beautiful, rare, and exotic flowers in Sumeru. Many of which were far too dangerous to even obtain, and that was something he realized far too late. He trusted you slightly. Actually, he didn't trust you. Kuni trusted Tighnari because you have consulted the expert many times about the flowers you picked.

But, one day, you fell ill. It wasn't due to the flowers or anything similar, but due to the weather. Kuni had been coincidentally passing by for a research project, and he stumbled upon you by a hillside, unconscious, bleeding, and sickly. You were lucky enough to forget your basket of flowers, meaning you hadn't lost any of your previously collected ones, but you were still quite unlucky. It was pouring, and atop a hill was a beautiful kalpalata lotus flower. It wasn't a terrible walk, except you were sick, and you ended up slipping and falling to what could've been your doom.

The moment Kuni saw you, he paid no mind to the flowers, nor did he care at all about his research. He needed to help you, and he, as quickly as he could, flew you over to Gandharva Ville, where he almost screamed for forest rangers to come and help you.

As you laid on the bed unconscious, Kuni stayed with you. He never left your side once.

And then you woke up.

“...What?” The pain in your head wrung from side to side, front and back. Your nose was significantly stuffier. Kuni, happy and terrified, immediately rushed over to you.

“Idiot! What were you doing out there?” He yelled, holding back the urge to punch himself for not finding you sooner, “You could've died from that sort'a height!”

“Sir, please, lower your voice. Y/N's healing process could falter if you don't shut up.” Tighnari hissed, and the two glared at each other.

“Fine, sorry. But still, what were you thinking? My birthday or whatever isn't that big a deal, and it's really not worth your damn life.” Kuni sat down on the stool next to the bed, and you looked down at the provided blankets.

“I mean, I'm not dead,” you conjure up a smile and hold in a cough, “but yeah. That was sort of stupid, but it would've been worth it if I did get you the flower.”

“What? You're mentally insane.”

“I could be.”

“That's— That's so stupid!” Why do all of that... for me? Kuni feels his chest ache again.

“Oh, it was. But hey, I'm really stupid when it comes to you.”

“What?” Kuni's eyes furrow, and Tighnari almost slams his head into the desk after hearing that.

“I mean that I'm literally stupid for you. Why else would I leave and get flowers when it's raining and when I'm sick?”

Something clicks in Kuni's head. He saw some of his peers in class talk about this phrase and suddenly connect it to some girl who was in love with a guy and...

Wait.

“I'm leaving. I'll be back— you'd better be conscious!”

“I can't guarantee that, but I'll try.”

Kuni leaves the room, frustrated. Nahida has said that he likes you, his peers have said the same thing, and maybe...

“I'm literally stupid for you.”

“That idiot..” He smiles, looking through the window to see you talking to Tighnari, who appears to be scolding you for being so careless with your health. Kuni holds in a chuckle and turns around. His ache resurfaces in his chest, and he grips the part of his top that covers his 'heart'.

Maybe, just maybe—

“I'm making a bouqet for you on your birthday!”

—maybe he is in love with you.

y/n's real name is robloxnation3000 /j

[heizours]

YOUR FIRST

summary. he overhears a conversation about who was your first favourite character in the game, and they grow jealous about it

tags. gn! reader, grammatical mistakes may occur

cw. none as far as i have check

feat. scaramouche, thoma, childe, xiao, dottore

< back to event m.list

INTRO.

"Who was my first favourite character during the early days I was playing it?" You repeated the same question that your friend was asking you.

"Precisely! C'mon, I'm sure there is someone who had really caught your attention the moment they entered a quest you were playing or something like that."

They responded back, as they waited eagerly yet patiently for you to tell them, while you were busy thinking and reflecting back on who it was.

Little do you know, that they are not only one who's itching to know your big revelation.

If the doors have eyes, then the walls or perhaps the screens have ears as well.

"Well, I'd say that the first character who caught my attention and became my favourite in a short span of time is-"

SCARAMOUCHE.

"-Childe! 

Scaramouche acts like he is not deeply affected by it and acts like it wasn't a big deal to him, but the expressions that were painted on his face betrayed the best of him.

Why are you smiling when Childe's the topic?

What did he do to make you joyous like this?

But... if he is the first character you like, is it now a liked?

There is this some sort of uneasy feeling that continues to brew and swirl inside of him the very moment your face had brighten up at the mention of the harbinger's name, and he has no idea how to stop it and why was he feeling it in the first place.

Is this another emotion that a heart can experience and learn, from time to time? What was it called again?

Ah yes, jealousy.

Scaramouche suddenly scoffs at the realization, finding it hard to believe that he would feel the bitterness of what enviousness is like sooner than he had anticipated, and the primary cause that triggered it was none other than that side character.

Childe? Cool and Captivating? Please, you haven't even seen how he could be a million times better than him.

"You mean to tell me that I'm simply getting worked up all for this? Why should I be bothered over it, when I could be a whole lot better than him? Heh"

THOMA.

-Itto! 

Thoma rarely taste the medicine of jealousy but seeing that look on your face when you rambled on about the oni, somehow snapped him into his senses. He felt the need to grab your attention from the screen to tell you that he is here too, and maybe - just maybe you could switch your favours around. 

I'm not jealous...being one is simply irrational

Maybe — I am a little bit jealous

Alright, I am jealous...

While he would be in denial at first with the jealousy he is dealing with, he would still come to the generalization that he is indeed jealous, and if he will have to cope up with it, he would put back on his smiley facade, only this time something about his smile is a little unpleasing, that even Itto himself will not dare to breathe around him.

But, instead of continuing to bottle up his jealousy and act petty like the others, he would understand why you favour the oni and would put that first before his feelings.

Don't be fooled though, compliment him too while you're at it!

“Oh...I didn’t know they like him. It sounds very surprising coming from them, but who am I to judge? Well then, has anyone seen Itto? I bet he will be delighted to hear the news!”

CHILDE.

“-Thoma! 

Childe laughs it off - Yes, it’s the laugh that you are thinking right now where he is this close from committing another arson. He is definitely not a second away from taking a trip to Inazuma and is on the go to plan a competition with the housekeeper, because he’s too cool to even to something like that.

I see, another challenger perhaps?

Hmph, what’s the point of challenging him if I know that I am the strongest?

Clear skies Ajax, clear skies

At this point, it is quite clear that he is turning into the embodiment of jealousy due to the amount of assurance that he is telling to himself, not because he is threatened by Thoma but because he is threatened that your favouritism about him will be the reason for his downfall.

He is threatened by the fact that you could easily evict him from your main team and replace him with someone else from another region who is just newly released and is almost a carbon copy as him, if not for the differences of their physical appearances.

It is indeed true that jealousy is a disease, that not even Ajax himself could flee from it.

“Thoma? I have heard of that name, but I also heard that I can excel ten times better at the things he could do. No- I’m not showing off, I am simply describing that I am a way better option than him, that’s it.”

XIAO.

“-Scaramouche! 

Xiao stays the same as he is, or -  that’s what he thinks. Truth to be told, he doesn’t even realize that he is jealous, but as they say - actions speaks louder than words, and the way he is acting right now shows how he is envied by this favouritism topic.

Did I expect too much?

I don’t like this feeling...

Is this what those mortals call as jealousy?

It takes a while for him to accept that he is jealous, but after that whole feeling finally sinks in, well let’s say he is displeased by this realization because by every second, that feeling continues to sink deeper and deeper as if it’s attempting to land in the deepest depth of the ocean. 

But, like Thoma, he is another who tries to get over with it and respects why you favour that character the most. Maybe it’s because you see them in a different light that others can’t, and he understands that.

Everyone has favourites, and he can’t blame you for that because even him has one which is you but he would rather not say it.

"Hm, while I do not fawn over him, I suppose I understand why you like him in the first place. Whatever makes you happy, is simply enough for me to know why."

DOTTORE.

- Alhaitam!

Dottore remains indifferent or so what he assures to himself, because if anyone where to see right through him, displeased is not even used enough to describe how disturb he is by that revelation.  

The Akademiya scribe is what they fawn over the most, hm?

How interesting....

Though, irritating would be the right word for it

His pride is wounded, and what makes it even more worse for him is he is a man of intelligence. So naturally, he is intimidated and threatened that the scribe who is also intelligent but not as him, could be the reason why he can’t turn the favour of you to him.

To get rid of the jealousy that he is feeling, he will dedicate most of his time (like he isn’t in the first place) inside his lab, doing things where only he knows what it is. He is one of the upper rank harbingers and dictated as the doctor for a reason, and the only way he could could get off the steam he is feeling, is to be busy.

While he is ordering around his clones and agents at the same time, any step or news that he gets from them and will be deemed as a failure, will have to face some serious issues from him, especially that Dottore is not in the mood to be in a dilly dally manner.

“Anything I need? Perhaps you can give me a little information about the scribe - take it or leave it. Either way, leaving it is not even an option in the first place.”

[himasgod]

Xiao x Reader

Where you rescue him, finding him defeated, and he swears to protect you.

(Today and yesterday I felt like writing about Xiao, so we have a double Xiao's one shot day hehe)

The night in Dihua Harsh was oppressive. The air was heavy with the dampness of mist and the metallic scent of ancient battles. In the background, echoes of distant wailing resounded, as if the shadows themselves were witnesses to the unquenchable hatred of the Archon War. Amidst those shadowy echoes, he stood, throwing his spear at invisible shadows, caught in a rut of endless violence. Xiao, the Yaksha Alatus, protector of Liyue and lone guardian.

The weight of his karmic debt tightened on his chest like an invisible poison, enveloping him in darkness. That night, the burden was particularly heavy, and each blow of his spear wore more on his spirit than his body. The last ghostly whisper dissipated, but Xiao felt no relief. He collapsed to the swamp floor, kneeling and gasping, as pain consumed him.

Then, a voice broke the silence.

“Are you… okay?”

It was a cautious murmur, almost inaudible through the mist. Looking up, Xiao saw you, a spark of alarm flashing through his golden gaze. There was no way a mortal could be here, so close to him and the dark forces lurking in his presence. Yet there you were, staring at him with a mix of unease and compassion.

“Stay away. You have no idea what you’re doing,” he told you, his tone full of warning. But you didn’t move. You knew it was dangerous to approach someone like him, a warrior shrouded in dark legends and struggles that mortals could barely understand. Yet worry kept you from taking a step back.

Xiao looked at you, surprised by your boldness and, deep down, by the familiarity of that gesture of kindness, something he had almost forgotten.

“I don’t need… your compassion,” he whispered, looking away. However, he didn't stop looking at you with his tired golden eyes, as if deep down he was asking for some rest.

So the moment he collapsed, you picked him up and carried him to Wangshu Inn.

One year later, since that meeting in the swamp, Xiao had kept his distance, watching you from the shadows during each day. Although he never came close, the memory of that night continued to resonate in him. Something in your gaze, in the delicacy of your words, had left a mark on his soul, a mark that, instead of causing him pain, seemed to illuminate his darkness.

On one of those nights, he saw you throw a lantern into the river. He could not hear your wish, but his heart sensed it: a prayer for peace, for the protection of someone you did not fully know, but in whom you believed. Xiao felt the loneliness that had accompanied him for centuries crack slightly, like a wall fracturing before the warmth of a persistent flame.

A strange, almost uncontrollable impulse led him to appear before you that night. His face maintained the same stoic expression as always, but something different shone in his golden eyes.

“Why do you insist on coming back here?”

He asked, his voice filled with confusion and a slight trace of anxiety. You could see the wear and tear on his features, the weight of each battle etched in every line of his expression.

“Because someone I hold dear needs to remember that he is not alone,”

You answered softly. He looked up and for a moment, hesitated, almost hoping that the darkness around him would drive you away. But you did not back away, and the reflection of the lantern light in your eyes was enough to keep his heart anchored in a place that no longer felt so gloomy.

“My duty is to protect Liyue,” he murmured, as if he were reminding himself of his purpose. But the words sounded empty even to him, because in your presence, reasons seemed to change, to evolve into something more than just duty.

With a barely audible sigh, he took a step towards you, getting close enough for the coldness of his presence to be dispelled by the warmth you emanated. The loneliness he had known, that had enveloped him for so long, was broken with every second he spent at your side, even if he himself could not quite admit it.

Finally, with a tremor in his voice, he confessed:

"Your words… that light… is the only thing that reminds my soul that there is something beyond the darkness."

And then, he extended his hand, brushing your cheek with a tenderness that almost seemed impossible for someone like him. The touch was light, almost as if he did not want to leave a mark, but in his gaze there was an intensity that spoke of centuries of loneliness dissipating at a simple gesture of humanity.

"I will protect you"

He said finally, with a firmness that did not accept doubts. Because in your presence, Xiao had found a purpose that, although uncertain and fearful of losing, filled him with a peace hadnt felt in millenia.

The light from your lantern flickered in the wind, but neither you nor Xiao looked away.

On that night in Dihua Harsh, a Yaksha and a mortal met and for an eternal instant, the loneliness seemed to fade away.

Here is my masterlist, in case you are interested in any more of my work or want to send me a request <3

[icysnails]

Kissing Their Forehead

Genre: Fluff, a tiny bit of angst

Pairings: Xiao, Welt, Kafka, Wanderer/Scaramouche, Kaveh, Blade x gn!reader (Seperate)

Warnings: Spoilers for both Genshin and HSR, Established relationship, Slightly Suggestive (Kafka), mentions of blood/wounds (Xiao + Blade), Kissing, some have more plot than others (╥﹏╥) - If I missed any, please let me know!

Word count: 400 - 600 words per character

Xiao

Nights like these were common for you and Xiao. The two of you meet up on the roof of Wangshu Inn every night, catching up on whatever you missed in each other’s absence during the day. This is also the time when Xiao listens to his heart, and allows you to get closer to him. Even after you’ve spent so much time together, he still isn’t used to the flurries of affection you throw at him, and tonight was no different.

When you lovingly press your lips to the diamond on Xiao’s forehead mid-conversation, his mind goes entirely blank. Surprise reflects in his amber gaze, and a wave of gut wrenching emotion surges through him. It’s a mix of joy, confusion, and grief- almost as if he’s experiencing both his terrifying past and his peaceful present at the same time. He had been alone for so long, keeping himself away from humanity unless absolutely necessary, to avoid the risk of hurting anyone should he lose control. He knows things aren't like that anymore- not with you around. He loves you and you love him in return, but he can’t help but feel guilty for being able to experience such affection. After what he had done over the course of his past, after he had stained his hands with so much blood, how could he ever deserve love? He views himself as dangerous- as a monster, and deep down, he thinks you deserve so much better than him. He had voiced this to you before, but you just cupped his face in your hands and smiled sadly at him, whispering that you wished he would think better of himself and that you wouldn’t trade him for the world.

Xiao couldn’t begin to understand why you felt this way, but at the same time, he is eternally grateful to have you with him. Your presence soothes him and illuminates the darkness of his heart- even if it feels selfish, he can’t help but melt whenever your lips meet his forehead. Xiao closes his eyes, leaning into your touch, pushing his spiral of insecurity to the side for now. When you pull away and look at him with your shining, lovestruck eyes, he can’t help but flush and move closer to you. His hand comes to rest on your cheek as his forehead comes to rest gently on your own. The world seems to stand still as you make eye contact, your lips only inches away from his. Xiao’s shoulders relax and the intolerable screams of dying demons he usually grapples with fade into serene silence. The Yaksha’s touch is careful and light, and his expression displays how deeply he longs to stay in this moment for as long as possible. However, he knows well that this desire is nothing but an empty fantasy, rendered impossible at the hands of time. Soon, danger and duty would cruelly pierce through the veil of peace, tearing you away from each other. So Xiao holds you and leans further into your warmth, cherishing the moment before it slips away once more.

Welt

Welt is a kind, tired old soul. He’s been through a lot, he’s seen a lot, and he’s lost a lot- two examples being his old friends and his home planet. He knows how quickly a once peaceful life can fade due to the dangers of the universe, and he knows how irreplaceable loved ones are. Unfortunately, he learned that the hard way. So, he wastes no time in showing you how precious you are to him. Luckily, you accept his displays of affection with excitement and return it back tenfold.

The two of you are going about your regular duties on the express when you catch Welt’s eye from across the train car. No one else is around, so you sidle over to him, trying not to be too obvious. Welt gives you a side eye as you do this, not knowing what to expect from the cheeky grin that’s making its way across your face. Only a minute later, Welt feels your presence next to him, and he swears that the smile you have plastered on is contagious. His own lips quirk up into a smile, and before he knows it, your body is pressed up against his, your arms constricting around him like there's no tomorrow. He lets out a sigh of endearment, his own arms gently moving to envelop you. Honestly, what was he going to do with you?

However, his infatuation quickly changes to confusion as you pull away slightly and rest your hands on his shoulders. You raise yourself a bit, attempting to reach his forehead, brows furrowing slightly in frustration due to his height. Soon enough, you manage to reach his forehead and your lips quickly make gentle contact with his skin. Welt chuckles softly, moving his hands to your waist, pulling you against him a second time. A massive grin breaks out on his face, and you swear you’ve never seen him happier in your life. Welt then cups your face and drowns you in a flurry of kisses, his own cheeks flushing profusely as he watches you become more and more flustered. The sounds of lovestruck giggles and playful remarks bounce off the walls of the train car, hours passing before the two of you remember your duties. Undoubtedly, the whole exchange ends with Welt fondly clinging to you with one of his hands carding through your hair, work entirely forgotten, as you wait for the rest of the crew to return.

Kafka

As expected, Kafka loves to tease. Her demeanor is alluring, drawing people to her in both hatred and love. While most disapprove of her title as a Stellaron Hunter, you seem to be an exception. In fact, it’s become very clear to her that she’s got you eternally and willingly caught in her web. She watches your every movement with immense amusement, her gaze dark yet loving as you fall apart from the products of her captivating existence. Often, she was the one initiating affection through words and subtle touches, adoring the way you choke on your words and desperately fumble for a half-decent response. More often than not, these interactions result in bolder acts of physical affection. Whether that’s innocent acts like allowing Kafka to tilt your chin up to kiss you, or you quickly embracing her as a way to hide your hopelessly heated face, or acts that are more… risque, you love every second you get to spend with her. And although Kafka wears a mask of cold, calm deceit, you know that when it comes to you, she doesn’t think twice about showing how genuine her love is.

Even if Kafka was skilled in making you flustered, you had been itching to initiate something on your own for weeks. To watch her get thrown off balance instead of you, all because of something you had said or done- it seemed like an impossible fantasy. Yet you persist in building up your courage, determined to express your love for her and pay her back for all the times she set butterflies off in your stomach. So, you carefully mapped out how you would go about your initiation, knowing that you would have to surprise your beloved in order to elicit any kind of reaction. The next day, you keep your eyes peeled for a moment when she’s idle and unaware of your presence. You manage to catch her while she’s reading, legs crossed casually as she sinks into the cushioning of her chair, eyes glinting with amusement at the book’s contents. Quietly, you enter the room, seemingly ignoring her- that is, until you reach her chair and swoop down to kiss her forehead before she can say anything. Afterward, you turn away and speed walk out of the room, internally reveling in the surprise that overtook Kafka’s features. Her eyes shot open wide, lips slightly parted, eyebrows raised. However, in your absence after the kiss, you didn’t see the fierce blush that spread over Kafka’s cheeks or hear the lovestruck giggle that involuntarily escaped her lips. And you definitely didn’t find out about Silverwolf walking in a few minutes later, only to find the woman folded over in her chair with her face in her hands, giggling like a schoolgirl and entirely refusing to look up. You had caused the most calm Stellaron Hunter to break her collected facade for once, which was incredibly hard to do. After making her feel so lovestruck, there’s no way she could just leave you alone. She would have to get back at you somehow- expect nothing less than to be smothered with her love over the next few days.

Wanderer/Scaramouche

Scaramouche had been going about his day as normal, bored out of his mind, desperately trying to find something interesting to do while vivid thoughts of you plagued his mind. Nahida had attempted to immerse him in different human activities, yet none of them seemed to take- he was either pretty bad at them, or he just gave up on them because he lost interest. Even the few battles he encountered during his day weren’t enough to take his mind off your absence. Needless to say, when you arrive home he’s all over you, trying to hide his longing for you behind a false mask of annoyance. But you can see right through him, adoration reflecting in your eyes as you quickly grab his face and press a firm kiss to his forehead. As you do so, a confused protest escapes his throat, the poor man startled by your sudden loving gesture. Afterward, you take his hand and drag him further into Sumeru to go get some food, but Scaramouche’s mind is entirely elsewhere. His pace is much slower than yours, making it slightly hard to lead him into the city, but he really can’t help it. Even now, even after the two of you have known each other for so long, you still manage to surprise him. He shields his face with one hand to hide his reddening cheeks and uses the other to tether you to him, picking up his pace so that you’re the one who’s being pulled. The giggle that this elicits from you doesn’t help either, as it only causes the butterflies in his stomach to burst even more.

After all, Scara wasn’t used to this. All his life, he’s been alone- always being left behind, always being used. He had become so accustomed to the feeling of anger and resentment that he didn’t realize how lonely he had indeed become. After he had the Electro Gnosis taken from him and his identity erased from Irminsul, his anger morphed into an overwhelming feeling of emptiness. Sure, erasing himself gave him a second chance at life, but his own loss of identity left him feeling void of any purpose or desire. That quickly changed when you were introduced to him though. As time went on, as he got to know you better, the void in his chest slowly became filled with the undying urge to protect you. The puppet didn’t understand what these emotions were or why he felt like this, but that didn’t matter to him. As long as you were safe, as long as he got to see your smile at the end of the day, he would be content. As you both reach your destination, Scara turns back to look at you, his heart immediately starting to hammer in his chest. You were beaming at him, a playful glint in your eyes- it was painfully clear that you were about to start teasing him for getting so flustered. Before you can say anything, Scaramouche gently takes your face in his hands and kisses you, gaze hopelessly soft. His gentle expression then turns into a devious smirk, amused by the way your eyes widen, entirely unsure of what to say. Now he can see the appeal of surprise kisses, and he’ll definitely be using them more often if this is the reaction he’ll get.

Kaveh

Kaveh cares for you more than anyone else. His passion for you is immense, so much so that it makes his passion for architecture pale in comparison- which is saying a lot because he loves architecture. In fact, it was practically his life until he met you, (aside from bickering with Alhaitham), and in his eyes, you're the greatest work of art to ever exist. Even the glistening walls and windows of the Palace of Alcazarzaray couldn’t match your glory. His genuine admiration for you often makes it hard for him to communicate how he feels- only one look is enough to get him red faced and stuttering. He does try though, he tries incredibly hard, but it just doesn’t work. The architect is constantly fighting with his own mind, wanting to spill out every ounce of love he’s feeling but not wanting to say the wrong thing. This internal conflict only intensifies during big projects, when all he can think of is you. He doesn’t get to see you often during these periods of time, which only makes him long for you more. So, when you pass by his desk, leaning over to see what he’s working on, you can imagine how deeply sidetracked he gets. When you ask what he’s doing, he starts explaining the details of the project, but quickly trails off as he sees the gentle smile on your face. Oh archons, you’re stunning, he thinks, fighting to find his words once more.

When he does, he quickly finishes his explanation, clearing his throat to try and cover up how deeply flustered he is. You nod and raise your eyebrows, impressed by his ambition and talent. Needing to get on with your own work, you wish him luck, brushing his bangs back and kissing him delicately on the forehead. Kaveh’s face explodes with red and suddenly he feels like the room is far too hot. He fans himself off with his hands, attempting to focus, but the feeling of your lips on his skin keeps replaying in his head. His thoughts are scattered all over the place, each stream of thought overlapping to become an insufferable cacophony of noise and feelings, to the point where he just can't take it anymore. Throwing his pencil down, Kaveh quickly gets up from his seat and somewhat aggressively hurries into the other room, where he finds you sitting on the couch, peacefully flipping through a book. He takes your hand, pulling you up toward his chest. His arms wrap around you tightly and he buries his face into your neck, your confused exclamations completely unheard by him. The architect’s resolve to continue working shatters as soon as you hug him back, his attitude clearly indicating that he doesn’t plan on letting go of you any time soon- not that you mind, of course.

Blade

Blade doesn’t understand why you like him so much. He doesn’t understand you, and how you keep going despite everything you’ve been through already. Though he doesn’t openly show his admiration for you, it's definitely there, despite the cold expression on his face. If you look just closely enough, you can see the way his gaze softens slightly whenever you enter the same room as him. You take this as permission for you to get near him and a confirmation that you aren’t being a burden by physically displaying your fondness for him. One way you show your infatuation with him is by patching him up after missions or fights, and unsurprisingly, he doesn’t understand why you do this either. He can heal himself for the most part, so why would you go through the trouble? Despite his lack of comprehension, he never fights back. The feeling of your gentle, loving hands on his skin soothes him, even if he has an abundance of painful gashes all over his body. The feeling of your lips on each of his wounds after you’ve tended to them is enough to get his heart beating faster, which is something that he thought was impossible to achieve.

Each time, just before you finish patching him up, you take his face in your hands, so carefully that you may as well be handling porcelain. From there, you guide his head slightly forward to almost meet your lips. Blade closes his eyes, his bandaged hand lifting to rest on top of one of your own, wanting to keep your warmth on his skin for as long as possible. A relaxed exhale slips past his lips as the tension in his shoulders deflates. When you finally press your lips to the soft expanse of Blade’s forehead, you can feel his hand start to shake slightly, his brows furrowing in confusion. You pull away, smiling warmly at him, washing away any confusion or sadness that lingers in his gaze. Your eyes meet and Blade’s mind becomes consumed by your touch. It’s been centuries since he’s felt this way- since he’s felt safe, since he’s felt like he has a home. Blade moves back, pulling you forward and into his lap. His hands carefully support your back, your chest pressing against him tightly while your head falls onto his shoulder. His breathing syncs up with yours as you shift to shyly return his embrace. Blade’s lips upturn into a small smile as you gently chastise him for moving so suddenly, warning that it may reopen his wounds. His chest grows tight in appreciation, his love for you growing with every breath he takes. No matter what tomorrow may bring, no matter how much pain he must endure, he knows it will all be alright as long as you’re safe.

[seafumes]

hiii!! can you do your hcs on xiao developing his feelings for you and/or confessing?

also ur theme is so pretty!! 🫶🏻

hii sweetie !! thank you sm !!!💞

Xiao Headcanons ,, Developing and Confessing his feelings.

cw: sort of spoilers (first line) if you haven't done the liyue main quest yet <3

Developing Feelings

he definitely fell in love with you as soon as you gave him that almond tofu.

he'd never admit that to himself though, just labeling it as a "strange feeling".

disappears whenever you come around, or whenever he senses you nearby.

thinks he's slick with his disappearances, but in reality you've already caught him in the act.

when you confront him, he says that you "distract him from his duties as an adeptus."

disappears again after that short conversation, and reflects on his feelings.

when he can't figure out what the feeling is, he goes to cloud retainer for help.

she tells him short and simply, that he's attracted to you.

to say the least, he's in disbelief that he could ever experience "mortal feelings."

nonetheless, he takes cloud retainer's word for it, and leaves to ponder on this new feeling some more.

Confessing Feelings

it takes him a long while to get mentally prepared to confess to you.

to be fair, it was obvious he had a crush on you, you just wanted to hear it from him first.

from the pendent he gave you to "ward away evil", and being told that you could call his name and he'll be there; it was obvious enough that he liked you.

he paces around for minutes on end deciding how he was going to do it.

in the end, he decides to tell you to meet him at Wangshu Inn.

he's surprised you actually show up, and his face heats up at the sight of you.

he says his confession quietly, but it was loud enough for you to hear.

"i've grown an attachment to you, and if you'll have me, i'd like to stay by your side."

by the end of it, his face is red, and his head is turned away from you.

he doesn't expect you to return his feelings, but when you take his hand into yours, his body relaxes.

that was all the reassurance he needed to know that you felt the same.

i hope you liked this!!!

likes and reblogs are appreciated!💞 - requests are open btw!

[honeykaes]

—𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐢

✦ face-fucking headcanons feat. ayato, xiao, zhongli, scaramouche

✦ warning: smut, 18+ content, minors do not interact

✦ disclaimer: afab!reader with no set pronouns, facefucking, blowjobs, rough sex, implied edging (scaramouche), heavy degradation (scaramouche), slight degradtion (xiao), facial (ayato), implied!brat reader (xiao), unedited

You always know how much Ayato loved to see your various reactions. When you agree to let him face-fuck you, he’ll tell you he’ll keep it a surprise until he actually decides to do it. Seeing you shyly take his length into your mouth, that rush of adrenaline and slight fear—if this would be the time—was always so utterly adorable to Ayato.

It would take months until you have finally arrived here. His thrusts are strong, his heavy balls hitting your chin with everyone. You could only shut your eyes tight, feeling the tip of his cock hit the back of your throat. You could feel the reverberations from his laughs, looking down at you with his hands gently caressing your cheek. His touch was so much gentler than the thrusts of his cock.

He would change the pace too, sometimes being slow and seeing you whimper and rub your thighs together and for others to be rampant with your hands clinging onto his toned thighs. He’ll keep edging himself more and more until when he’s finally done, his cum will shoot out staining your face with his thick cum.

“You look so utterly cute like this, struggling to take my length in. That’s it, just a little more sweetheart. Make sure you use that tongue of yours…!”

Whenever you bobbed your head on his length, sucking tightly while your hands squeezed at the base of his cock—Xiao’s urges always began getting the better of him. He always warned you about sucking him off like this, throwing those teasing smirks and smiles every now and again as your free hand rubbed against his thigh. You know he can’t help himself, which he why you wanted to poke at that monster he could become.

His cock would rapidly slide in and out of your mouth, grunting whenever he felt your tongue slide against the thick veins of his cock. His grip on your face was tight as ropes of saliva and precum clung to your glossy lips and his pelvis.

 Feeling you gag and try to accommodate for his rapid pace, fingers wandering down to play with your clit was enough for him to lose it. Pressing your face all the way to his pelvis, the familiar taste of his salty essence spurted out staining your tongue and throat, swallowing the globs of it.

As you finally pushed yourself against his cock, you wiped your lips from the cum that managed to escape seeing the absolute shame on Xiao’s face.

“Why do you consistently tease me? Do you want to be used as a toy that badly?! Fine!“

You and Zhongli have wanted to do face-fucking for a long time, but Zhongli was a bit worried about it. As having such a big and thick length, he was worried it may be too much for you to handle, but you always reassured him. As a compromise the two of you gradually worked your way to his point, him training to take his cock deeper and deeper down your throat until he feel comfortable doing so.

And that moment, it seemed the mild-manner Zhongli finally dissipated and a reflection of his past peaked through.

Tears pricked your eyes feeling Zhongli slide himself in and out of your mouth at a rapid pace. With low grunts and growls, his hands tightly gripped your shoulders. He could feel your tongue trying to swirl against his sensitive tip.

His gaze seemed to be solely on your chest, watching as it would move to the rhythm of his deep thrusts as if completely entranced.  Feeling his cock beginning to pulsate and spasm into your mouth, it didn’t take long before his heavy cock left your mouth only for hot cum to splay onto your chest.

With a heavy sigh, Zhongli could only flash a smile, wiping away the saliva and precum on your lips as his hands finally moved down to press against your sobbing folds.

“…It seems I may have lost myself there, my apologies my love. Why don’t I, pay it back to you as well?”

Seeing you spasm with his cock still inside of you, Scaramouche immediately glared down. Clicking his tongue in shame, his cock immediately left your velvety walls, placing them near your lips instead. Knowing your punishment for cumming has started, you gladly opened your mouth, taking his length into it. 

His lips turned downwards as you suck and try to keep his cock in your mouth. He always seemed to make you do this whenever you managed to cum without his permission. You could feel the burn of your clit, knawing at you and desperate to be touched and fondled. 

Almost as if he could sense the change in your attention, your eyes blow wide feeling Scaramouche push his length deeper inside of your mouth. That frown of his turns upright into a smile, placing his head on your hair to bob your head to meet his thrust. 

A string of curses left his lips, watching you struggle and try to maintain his rough thrust. His laughs mix with moans echos out to the room, satisfied by the expression on your face.

“The whore just couldn’t listen, could they? Cumming on my fingers without permission, you know better. I guess there’s no better punishment than treating you like the slut you are.”

[thelordofhats]

Dullahan as Heathcliff’s EGO

There’s two parts to this post, more or less: the first is the in-setting evidence that this could be the case. Honestly, this is the less interesting part of this to me, but I think it’s important to lay out why I think it’s possible. The second is about what this tells us about Heathcliff as a character.

There’s Canto 6 spoilers, obviously, but this is also just going to be long enough that it’s just polite to insert a cut, so here we go.

Supporting Evidence

First up, we have seen, both with Philip in LoR and Dongrang in Canto 4 of Limbus Company, that the EGO a person manifests and what they look like as a Distortion are connected—they’re going to use the same visual language. The Crying Children still has the fire and statue theming of Philips unnamed incomplete EGO, and when Dongrang manages to undistort, Farmwatch has the same hat, horns, and, well, farm imagery that his distorted form had, just not as a weird monster this time.

Wild Hunt Heathcliff is not the exact same as Erlking Heathcliff. Besides the obvious fact that he’s waging his war on Wuthering Heights instead of Himself as a Concept, you have visual differences like the eyepatch, Wild Hunt having an Iron Maiden instead of a coffin, and most importantly, a different mount. Where Erlking’s Dullahan is a straight-up headless horse (I say, as though that is a normal thing), Wild Hunt’s Dullahan is, as best as we can tell without the head, some sort of wolf creature—clawed feet, a different tail, that sort of thing. Which is, as you’ve probably already guessed, reminiscent of Distorted Heathcliff. And I don’t think that that’s a change that Project Moon made for no reason.

The other big piece of supporting evidence is in Wild Hunt Heathcliff’s UT3 story (well, stories), in which he reflects a bit on the whole “commanding the dead” thing he’s got going on now. Specifically, the fact that it just sort of happened. He didn’t schedule an appointment with Dead Corp to get hooked up with their sweet necromancy tech, it was just a thing that he became able to do. Now, we *could* say this is some wholly unexplained thing, but come on. This is Project Moon. They do not toss out massive no-reason plot holes at us. Of the framework we’ve been given, EGO is the most logical explanation for how this happened. Especially when you consider how it lives up for him ~*~thematically~*~

(Oh, but before I move on to that—Bodysack, like all of the Base EGOs, is manifested with the help of Mephistopheles. I don’t think we should necessarily think of it as being in the same progression, although it does fit with the coffin/iron maiden)

Character Themes

Or: What does this tell us about Heathcliff?

Well, first I have to talk a bit about EGO in general. Hitting the ignition point, where you get the Carmen Chat, requires Desire and a Will to see those desires out. Non-capitalized ego, if you will. Philip’s desire to stop feeling inadequate, Xiao grief (I know this is a bad summary of Xiao but this isn’t a Xiao essay), Dongrang’s need for More (please refer to Xiao parenthetical, substitute Dongrang for Xiao). Manifesting EGO instead of distorting is about Self-Acceptance and Self-Control—Philip was keeping it together (sort of) until he started denying his inner drives to Oswald and pretending that that wasn’t something he felt. Xiao went “yes, I am being selfish and have selfish desires, but that doesn’t mean I have to be a bad person”. Dongrang stopped being “Dongrang, Who Denies All” when he admitted “You know what, I’m a selfish piece of shit, and I’m going to embrace being a selfish piece of shit”. EGO does *not* require you to be a good person!

For Heathcliff, that desire is, as you saw on his bat, REVENGE. He’s spent a lifetime hurting, and there is a part of him that he’s been storing up all of that hurt, holding onto it, and nurturing it into a Grudge. He wants so very, very badly to be able to hurt those who have hurt him. But it’s not the only desire within him—his love for Cathy is also a powerful motivator.

In Canti 6, faced with truly losing Cathy with absolute heartbreak, we see REVENGE become his only pillar. He desperately needs to take out this pain in *somebody*, and it doesn’t really matter who. He’s ready to give in to it all, lose control, and blindly lash out at his surroundings until Wuthering Heights is reduced to rubble around him. Possibly on top of him—he does not care. And so, he Distorts.

Wild Hunt Heathcliff has taken the reins of these impulses, instead of letting them drive him blindly. He wants to make those who hurt him suffer, but he does so with his eyes fully open, ready to be patient to maximize the pain he inflicts—maiming Gregor, the mountain of corpses in his wake, letting the Heights organize one last stand against him, a grand banquet. And it is through this self-mastery that he gains the means to make this suffering he inflicts last beyond the grave—to bind their souls in his service, so that even as they despise him and curse him, they are nonetheless bent to his will. He has manifested Dullahan.

To Wild Hunt Heathcliff, suffering is the base state of the world. Any moment of comfort, respite, or tenderness is ephemeral, a momentary shelter against the rain that will inevitably be lost. He has rejected Cathy’s love entirely, not because he does not love her, but because he does not believe in love as being a solid, real thing. Not like hatred is. Hatred is forever. You can *rely* on hatred. And if you are able to find satisfaction in being hated, to drink deeply from that spiteful well, you’ll never go thirsty. No, you’ll live in a veritable land of plenty. A miserable, bitter land of plenty, and you’re going to be a miserable and bitter fuck, but at least you’ll have the satisfaction that the people who hate you died mad and continue to be mad. That’s the core of Dullahan,

The third act swerve of this essay is that I do not think that our Heathcliff is going to be able to manifest Dullahan, because he isn’t that person anymore—the path that leads there has been closed to him. Hindley and Linton are dead, and he has bigger concerns right now—the bat no longer says Revenge, it says Remember. The revenge pillar is the one that crumbled, so he is—unsteadily—driven more by his love for Cathy right now. If he continues in this path, his EGO (and come on, we *will* get to see the full EGO for everyone eventually) is going to be something else entirely. Some similar motifs, of course, but taken in a new direction. Hopefully a healthier one!

And I think that’s really neat!

[pokidot]

MANDELA — thirteen

wc: 734

Knock, knock, knock.

Loud, but not persistent. A ghastly echo that didn't fade, twisted branches scratching against one another as they resembled brittle bones. The cabin that sat in front of them was still in this sunrise, wood walls a statue in the cool air.

The woman, Kane, opened the cabin door hesitantly as her eyes made the rounds of the surrounding people. She was dressed in a long and flowy white dress that undulated in the little breeze there was, material hanging loosely as if it didn't belong on her body. You grinned in response to her confused aura, holding up Hu Tao's hands still bound together in the cuffs.

"I said I wouldn't disappoint, here I am!" You chirped, a contrast from the solemn tone you did have. “It took many…many sacrifices to get here right now, I’m desperately relying on that payola.”

Kazuha’s eyes narrowed to Xiao skeptically to mouth, ‘payola?’ to him, but even he didn’t know what you were saying. His eyebrows furrowed, sighing to himself in defeat.

Kane’s eyes moved to you, an empty gaze reflecting as if she couldn't fully comprehend the situation. You sniffed this out quick, because as soon as your smile went to falter, her mouth immediately twitched up to all of them. But it didn't seem like a smile, more so a reflex to you. "I should have had a lot more faith in you, I'm sorry. I don't have a good history with...college students."

“Spoken as if you’ve talked to college students regularly at one point?” Venti asked.

“HILARIOUS, OH MY GO—” Your laugh came out abruptly, laughing like it was the funniest joke in the world, but it quickly died down once you realized that everyone was looking at you now. Especially Kuni, with dull eyes. “Oh, uh,” You looked back at Kane’s eerie smile fixed into place. “It wasn’t a joke?”

“I don’t think it was ever that funny of one, if it is a joke.” Kuni clenched his jaw, “Why are you smiling like you’ve been practicing anyway, Tachibana? Are you even who we’re looking for?”

Venti looked rather accomplished at the very notion that you wanted to hit, putting his hands on his waist and tilting his head proudly at you.

Something about the woman unnerved the group, rightfully so, because it looked like she was mimicking an emotion she didn’t even felt. It was so uncanny valley to even watch, but you wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. “She just found out her husband’s missing, guys. Let’s keep our wits, now.”

“Could’ve fooled me, she looks like she’s enjoying the hell out of herself.” He replied back. “Seriously. Are you gonna let us in so we can see what’s going on, or are you going to make us stand out here like mindless sheep?”

“Yes, come in while scrutinizing me in front of my own house.” Kane’s smile twitched again, corners of her mouth trembling. “It’s hard to imagine for you, but I’d rather be anywhere than here right now.“

He would have believed her if it weren’t for the inane reaction and the fact that she felt like she was struggling to play a role in a play right. His violet eyes narrowed. “So…you acting like a nut job is your impulse reaction, or?”

“Oh my god,” Aether cried, covering his ears. “Stop. The voices are coming back, I can’t even hear my own breathing with how loud Andrew is in my ear.”

“Andrew better be anything other than Garfield, or I’m blowing this bitch up.” Heizou warned.

“See? He understands how this works. I’m halfway to taking the former.” And with that, his eyes scanned the area for any signs of foul play. “Fine, I’ll bite. But you better be telling the truth about his disappearance, or you’re done fucking with us and I’m driving a stake into your heart, demon.”

Kuni walked past her as he aggressively pulled Hu Tao with him, the two of them entering the home after he got in the client’s face and started telling her shit. You awkwardly looked behind to see the rest of his friends paralyzed in most likely stun.

Your lips trembled as you tried not to laugh, tears in your eyes from the sheer force. “That was so sassy yass gurl of him.”

“I thought he didn’t believe in ghosts..?” Kazuha asked.

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NOTES || *crickets* ... this storys been out for a year and its still not done chat, it may be cooked

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[isshua]

Breaking the Wall (Find Comfort in Those Who Might Hear You)

Sagau Xiao x Reader

I haven’t been feeling great lately, so I decided to write this little story to cheer myself up. I had this idea about what might happen if Teyvat’s environment were to reflect your emotions whenever you logged on, and by extension whatever character you are currently playing as. I also wanted to write my own play on a character “breaking the fourth wall” in order to communicate with their player. This story follows the more classic sagau trope of how the characters are semi-aware of the fact that they’re living in a videogame but view it as a sort of boundary between their world and ours.

Xiao is a huge comfort character to me and I mostly wrote this for myself as a way to cheer myself up. I thought it came out okay though, so I decided to share it here. Hope you guys enjoy! :)

To break the Wall meant instant termination.

  Teyvat made this clear. It would not allow its people to make contact with the divine world. Forging a connection that extended beyond the mechanics of life was simply not meant to be. The Vessels could communicate with the Creator within the bounds of Teyvat’s laws; that was what being a Vessel was all about in the first place. For non-Vessels, then such hopes for communication with the God Above All Gods was impossible. That was how Teyvat was designed. That was how things were meant to be.

  Xiao, typically, did not mind following the rules. After all, he was an immortal being with thousands of years of experience in his belt. He knew attempting to break the Wall would result in his death. Long ago, before he had been chosen to be one of the Creator’s envoys, he hadn’t even cared about the Wall. Why would he want to break it? Meddling in such matters was not of his concern. His duty was to protect Liyue, nothing more.

  But then he got to know you. And his feelings for you only grew. When you chose to, you guided him through his daily tasks with kind words and praising whispers. When your golden light possessed him, his karmic debt would dissipate and he would feel a thousand years younger than he really was. You took him to places he never dreamed of seeing: the peaks of Dragonspine, the streets of Inazuma City, the dunes of the Sumeru desert. With you, there was a sense of adventure. With you, there was excitement. With you, he felt whole.

  You did not speak often, not that he was bothered by it. He was an introverted soul, one who appreciated the silence between the two of you whenever you would travel together. Occasionally you would comment on the environment or the enemy he was fighting. Sometimes you grew frustrated after completing domains-not with him, he understood, but rather with the horribly mediocre artifacts the two of you would receive. He liked it when you laughed. The noise was so clear and invigorating, he found himself hoping to hear it every time you appeared. He liked when you would softly hum some unknown tune from the faraway land you inhabited. He loved it when you acknowledged him, how he was a stronger and better version of himself only because of your dedication to him despite knowing the many sins he has committed. If you could have known the impact you had on him, you might find it amusing to see how easy it had been to steal the aloof Yaksha’s heart.

  There were so many things about you that he loved. But there was one single thing he hated.

  He hated it when you cried.

  The day began as a typical one. You had not possessed him for the entire week, not that this was something to be worried by. You typically did disappear due to some strange thing called ‘college,’ but you always came back. Xiao largely spent his day patrolling Dihua Marsh, slaying monsters, and saving the occasional mortal from dying at the hands of hilichurl tribes. He did not interact with anyone beyond stiff acknowledgment; the only person he did talk to on a regular basis was the Traveler, and the last he heard of them, they were somewhere in Sumeru, ever exploring, always curious.

  Your presence was not anticipated, but it was welcomed. When your golden light descended upon him during late afternoon and he felt your presence tugging at his mind, he felt contentedly unsurprised. Your voice echoed his name: “Xiao. Let me in.”

  He did not resist and allowed your influence to settle within his body. “You called?” he murmured, halfheartedly hoping for a reply. You never did answer him whenever he greeted you, but that was due to the Wall. Conversations were strictly one-way.

  He waited for you to take control. Whether it meant being teleported somewhere or just taking off into Dihua Marsh, he knew the two of you would be off eventually. He waited. And waited. A minute went by. He did not move.

  “Your Grace?” he called out, puzzled. He could feel you, he knew you were there. So why weren’t you interacting? Surely you didn’t appear just to stare at him, right? What is going on?

  Something wet fell onto his hand.

  He looked up at the sky and immediately noticed the ugly gray clouds gathering overhead. A filter of mundane color cast out the light of the sun. Droplets of rain started pattering down onto his face, his hair, and his clothes, leaving him drenched. But he did not stop staring. Because within his head, he could hear soft sobbing.

  The Creator was weeping. And so Teyvat weeped along with them.

  The first thing he felt was anger. Who hurt you? he wanted to ask. Who would dare make you cry? But as he listened to your cries and watched the rain come down, he realized that anger would do nothing to help. He could not solve your problems. After all, he was in Teyvat, and you were somewhere else entirely. His second reaction was to comfort you, but he could think of nothing to say. The issue of you two being separated was still in effect. The Wall would not allow him to offer you any consoling words. He had no choice but to let you suffer alone.

  But by the Archons, you were making his heart ache. Xiao was one to usually think that tears were for the weak, but he could not make himself see you in a pathetic light. Would it not be pitiful of him to deem his Creator as a lamentable coward? He didn’t even know why you were crying. You could be in danger!

  That’s when he decided. I have to make contact with them.

  It was a nearly impossible feat. But he knew he could do it.

  Break the Wall. Establish communication.

  He had never heard of anyone doing it before. Not even Rex Lapis, the strongest god he knew, dared mess with such an unpredictable, mysterious force of power. The Wall was not hard to find, but it took willpower to face it. Xiao didn’t know if he would perish the moment he did, or if it would take time for him to dissolve away. There were too many possibilities of failure. He could think of no way this sudden plan of his would lead to success.

  But your crying was like a million arrows piercing into his heart, and the pain of his karmic debt was rising as he continued to soak in your negative emotions. He was hurting right along with you-but if he could only talk to you, things could be made right.

  Xiao held out his hand, and his jade spear materialized. He braced himself and raised the polearm high into the air. Focusing on the ground beneath him, he concentrated and felt his surroundings. The energy of Teyvat came to him quickly, most likely due to being exposed to your power for so long…and then he pinpointed it. The moment of weakness. He brought his spear down with every bit of strength he had and tore into the fabric of reality. A gaping hole of darkness ripped right under his feet. He did not scream when he fell in, nor did he grunt in pain when he slammed into a glass-like surface after his short freefall. Everything was dark, except for the millions of green bolts of  electricity racing all around him at the speed of light. Your golden glow encompassed him and fended off the overwhelming power this Abyss-like area radiated.

  He looked at his hands. His weapon was nowhere to be seen, and the tips of his fingers were…glitching. In fact, his entire body seemed to be crackling-falling apart and knitting itself back together with technic shrieks. It was a sure sign that he was in a place not meant for him. He had done it; he had broken through the Wall. Now he was beyond it, but where, he did not know. Surely this can’t be the Creator’s domain, he thought. This place was far too dark, and there was no hint of your aura anywhere except for within him. But it had to be the realm in which he would form a connection with you.

  He could still hear your crying, but now, it was less ‘in his head’ and much more clear. Xiao walked forward, his footsteps echoing against the glass floor. “Your Grace!” he called. “Can you hear me? It’s me, Adeptus Xiao!”

  No answer. He was utterly alone in this place…but the sound of your crying was getting undeniably louder. Xiao pinpointed on the direction in which it was coming from and took off. With each step he took, the glow of your light grew brighter. He took that as a sign of goodwill.

  And then, he saw you. You were sitting at a strange looking desk with your head buried in your arms. Xiao slowed to a walk and crept tentatively up to you. He had never seen your physical form before, and only had a minor grasp of your appearance from the various statues of you scattered across Liyue and the abstract depictions of your form in history books. To be honest, he had been expecting you to be a bit more…god-like. The person in front of him did not look like an all-powerful deity. They were ordinarily mortal, and possessed no external qualities that differentiated them from the average human being.

  But then you lifted your head to scrub your tears away, and his breath was lost within his chest. Within your eyes he could see countless stars, and flecks of gold were scattered through your hair. All around you, there was an explosion of light, and Xiao was exposed to the warming feeling of your aura at an even greater intensity than usual. This was you. You might have looked human, but you were undeniably, most definitely his god.

  “Your Grace,” he uttered, kneeling at your side. “It’s alright, I’m here now. I heard your cries. You called out my name. Please, let me speak to you.”

  You didn’t respond. The connection still wasn’t there. Xiao tried again. “Your Grace, can you hear me?”

  You let your head flop back into your arms and continued to sob. Xiao leaned back on the balls of his feet and couldn’t help but growl in frustration. That damned Wall was still keeping you and him apart! What more did he have to do in order to simply talk to you?

  His eyes flitted to the strange device set up on your desk. It had the appearance of a box, but at its front there was a screen, and on it was displayed a shrunken image of Dihua Marsh. This must be a divine mechanism. It’s a way for you to forge contact with Teyvat. What…what would happen if he touched it? Would that finally allow him to communicate with you? He had his doubts, but it was worth a shot.

  Without hesitation, he pressed his palm over the screen. There was a jolt of energy that started at his fingertips, then rocketed through his entire body. He shuddered at the electrocuting sensation and refused to allow himself to flinch away, even when every instinct in his body was telling him to do so. The Wall was trying to repel him; like hell he was going to allow it to do that.

  With his other hand, he reached out to you. At first, he was nervous to touch you, for why should a creature tainted by karmic debt and innocent blood be allowed to embrace the God Above All Gods? He shakily slipped his hand over your cheek and raised your head. Your cries stuttered, and your eyes widened open in confusion. You were not looking at him, but rather at your divine mechanism’s screen.

  “Don’t cry,” Xiao whispered. He swiped your tears away with his thumb. “There is no need to cry. I’m here. I’m with you.”

  He desperately hoped you could hear him. He hoped even more that you would reply.

  You had no idea what the hell was going on.

  Today was a horrible day. A day filled with anxiety and embarrassment and ruined expectations that things might go right, only for them to go wrong. When you returned to your room and let yourself collapse into your desk chair, you thought playing your favorite game might cheer you up. After all, losing yourself in a fantasy world was practically the best way to forget what the real world was like.

  You logged into Genshin Impact and found yourself where you left off last time you played: in Dihua Marsh. Your current character was Xiao, and he stared blankly out at you while you waited for the game to catch up with your internet and for everything to load in. But you did not feel any happier. In fact, you felt worse. The events of the day were just too much to simply forget, and pretty soon, your hand slipped off of your mouse as you slumped forward onto your desk and started to cry. It did not feel good to let your emotions out. The sobs shaking your body were ugly, and the tears staining your cheeks made you feel gross. But you couldn’t stop, and frankly, you didn’t expect to for quite some time. These were tears you had been holding in all week; it was only a matter of time before the dam broke and the water came rushing out.

  You did not expect to feel a sudden intuition to lift your head. You did not expect for your body to automatically follow that intuition, either. It was like someone was lifting it for you, and when your blurry eyes raised to focus on your computer’s screen, you were shocked to see that the in-game chat box had a message in it. It didn’t make any sense. You weren’t in a co-op world, and you were pretty sure you were far too preoccupied with crying your eyes out to accept someone’s co-op request. Could it be a glitch? Far too curious for your own good, you clicked on the chat box and opened it.

  Two words had been sent to you by an unknown entity with no icon. “Don’t cry.”

  “What…?” you mumbled.

  More messages appeared. “There is no need to cry.”

  “I’m here.”

  “I’m with you.”

  This had to be some sort of joke. Someone hacked your account. This had to be a real person.

  It was then that you noticed Xiao was gone.

  “I know what it feels like to break. I understand what you are feeling.”

  “Just know that I am here for you. I will always be here for you. All you have to do is call out my name.”

  “Xiao?” you breathed.

  You felt the phantom sensation of someone wiping your tears. The scent of Qingxin flowers wafted fainty around you.

  “Yes,” the chat-box answered. “I am here.”

[accio-victuuri]

Xiao Zhan Marie Claire Cover story | Rules & Inches

When I say the word "future",

The first syllable is in the past.

When I say the word "silence",

I've broken it.

When I say the word "nothing",

I have created something that nothingness itself can grasp.

——Vislava Szymborska, "The Three Strangest Words"

Xiao Zhan held up a handheld fan to dry the sweat from the filming. When the photographer signaled the start, he stepped forward, stepped back, walked again, and continued to retreat. The props on his back are like airplanes, and his eyes are constantly searching for the camera, and he is like a naughty child exploring an unknown world. Every time I go back and forth, I am thinking about the more refined possibilities between advancement and retreat.

It’s hard not to notice Xiao Zhan’s sense of proportion. When being interviewed, he has a catchphrase: "Can you say this?" Or, as if to confirm himself, "You can say it like this." He also reflects on himself all the time. For example, I repeatedly remind myself not to let my performance become inertia. Once I get used to it, it will develop into terrible inertia. For example, he often emphasizes that he doesn't like to make mysteries, and he may not understand many truths. What he shares is only his sincere daily feelings. For another example, when he heard a crew member commenting on his "striving for excellence", he responded that he had not yet reached "refinement" and only wanted to "benefit".

Xiao Zhan spoke slowly and eloquently. He did not have a thunderous and fiery personality. He chatted calmly and had the ancient style of a benevolent gentleman. He's not tight at all. They chatted all over the world, and when they got to the point where they were enjoying themselves, they naturally leaned back on the chair and gently held their right legs with both hands. The content of the chat ranged from the unchanging emotions contained in the golden songs of the times to AI, the views on human beings, as well as his own performances and life experiences.

In 2023, three TV series starring Xiao Zhan will be broadcast one after another. He played the colorful father, the lonely and cold eldest son, and the newcomer who struggled in the workplace. Every time he enters a crew, he will dream about real scenes and real pressure related to filming. After the dream is over, he sinks himself into the heart of the character and performs it, leaving vivid memories and feelings.

There is a ruler in the heart and a square inch outside the body. What's appropriate is Xiao Zhan's inner view, his precise view of work, life and himself. A few inches away is Xiao Zhan's external perspective, his perceptual understanding of the past, time, space and the world. Between the length and the shortness of a ruler, heaven and earth appear.

======

Three TV series have been aired and new dramas are being filmed. For actor Xiao Zhan, 2023 is a fruitful year.

Occasionally, when he looks back on his career as an actor, Xiao Zhan will be in a daze for a moment. In the blink of an eye, it seems that he has been there for a long time. Almost every time he shoots a movie, he has a routine: dreaming. I dreamed about memorizing lines, dreaming about acting against a director, or even dreaming about taking a math test, but couldn’t solve any of the questions on the paper, and then I woke up with a start.

Xiao Zhan felt that this was caused by pressure, and he accepted it calmly. Perhaps there is another reason. Deep down in his heart, he does not regard himself as a qualified actor, but always puts himself in the position of a newcomer, with an attitude of learning and exploration. Therefore, every time he goes to a crew, he has the experience of starting all over again.

Xiao Zhan is very wary of inertia. Sometimes he also advises himself not to be under so much pressure, not to get into trouble, and to try to be more relaxed. But once he realizes that he starts to rely on performance models, experiences and habits, he will remind himself that taking things for granted is dangerous. After a long time of inertia, inertia will occur, and inertia will lead to "taken for granted". Therefore, every time he interprets a role, he always has to gain some freshness.

Xiao Chunsheng in "Where Dreams Begin" is a character full of freshness. Because there are extremely obvious differences between him and Xiao Zhan himself. Xiao Chunsheng is a young man in Beijing in the 1970s, which is completely different from the era and environment in which Xiao Zhan grew up.

Military coats, "28 big bar" bicycles, the ice surface of Shichahai, and the transformation from a young boy to a middle-aged entrepreneur are not familiar to Xiao Zhan. To this day, Xiao Zhan can still see "traces" of Xiao Chunsheng: when it comes to the character Chen Hongjun in the play, he always says "Hong Jun'er". Those were the Beijing movies and Er Huayin that I practiced when filming started. "Ouch" and "Ouch" were all words on Xiao Zhan's lips.

The language, objects and sense of time are all okay. For Xiao Zhan, the biggest difference from Xiao Chunsheng is his personality. He is an "I person" who enjoys being alone, while Xiao Chunsheng is the complete opposite. He makes many friends and loves to socialize too much. Measured by today's standards, this extreme warm-heartedness often means a lack of a sense of boundaries. "The times are developing faster and faster. Today's young people are living a fast-paced life and will not easily cross the boundaries of getting along." Xiao Zhan commented, "But Xiao Chunsheng is an extremely meddlesome person, so it is easy to offend Someone else." When he read the script, he was quite intimidated by this role and felt that it would be difficult to act like it. But after hesitating for a long time, a thought suddenly caught his attention: Maybe the qualities we care about today contain exactly what we need.

Fresh, this is Xiao Zhan’s summary of Xiao Chunsheng and his contemporaries. "If you hate them, you hate them. If you like them, you like them. Don't you think the colors of each of them are particularly bright?" he asked. Even now, when thinking back to some scenes in "The Sea in Dreams", he still feels that the characters are shining brightly and vividly.

After playing Xiao Chunsheng, a person who is far away from current values, Xiao Zhan also gained something in terms of mentality: don't be afraid of making mistakes. He said: "A truly lovable character will have imperfections." During the filming, he once asked the director if it was particularly annoying for Xiao Chunsheng to worry so much about others. The director told him that it was precisely because of this "annoyance" that he was Xiao Chunsheng, and "annoyance" was his charm.

The director's words suddenly awakened Xiao Zhan. Sometimes he would fall into a strange circle, hoping to avoid and correct the imperfections of the character. "When you change it like this, the character itself loses its charm." Xiao Zhan said, "So I think you should not be afraid when doing homework for the character. Be enthusiastic when you should be enthusiastic, and cross the boundary when you should. If you always consider the character's The shortcoming is, thinking about what will happen if the audience scolds me, it will be difficult to act." Because actors play roles, not personalities.

Not being afraid of flaws, to some extent, also means the courage and ability to seek truth. "Sunshine by my Side" is Xiao Zhan's first appearance in an urban workplace drama. His reason for taking on this drama is simple: modern dramas are too close to reality and everyone is living it, so it is difficult to perform it to make everyone believe it. Because he was unsure and confident, he firmly believed that he would learn something after "gnawing" it down. Thus, the character Sheng Yang came into being.

"Sunshine by my Side" made Xiao Zhan realize that urban dramas rely heavily on the cooperation between actors. Because it is more life-like, every point will not be stuck, and the lines and performances will be slightly adjusted. "We are all living people, and we do not exist to maintain a persona. What everyone does, says, and expresses emotions are natural, reasonable, and flowing. If you change, my performance will also change. It will change accordingly." Xiao Zhan said that this kind of creative coupling eliminates the possibility of actors being rigid and mechanical, so it is a fresh and fun experience.

Sheng Yang is a designer, which happens to be the job that Xiao Zhan has done. With personal experience, flexibility during performance can be guaranteed. "When Shengyang wanted to draw the design drawings, I would actually draw them there. Sometimes I would tell them, art teacher, your layers seem to be locked and I can't move." Xiao Zhan recalled, " Because it's his own life, he's better at it. Can you say that? Okay." He never forgets his sense of proportion when it comes to his true feelings.

Xiao Zhan is no stranger to TV series with fantasy themes. "Yuguyao" is the most recent example. For him, acting in a play with such an imaginary background requires a process of starting from scratch. Facing a green screen, if you want to imagine extreme weather or breathtaking scenery, you need to create it yourself. As for whether the state is real and whether the emotion is subtle, more often than not, one has to trust the evaluation made by the director behind the monitor.

Whether it is a costume drama or a modern drama, Xiao Zhan always has a clear understanding of the script and characters. "There are always few good things at any time, which is why people always say that they are rare." He recalled his observations over the years, "Some scripts may be considered good by the industry, but the market feedback may not be so good. Everyone What is the definition of good? Is it good sales or good word-of-mouth? It's hard to judge." Therefore, what he can do now is to return to his own understanding and feelings and choose what he thinks is the best. Role. As for what role he most wants to play, Xiao Zhan said: "I have been mentioning it for many years, a cute and charming villain, if I get the chance."

=======

When reading the script of "Where Dreams Begin", Xiao Zhan's mind would be filled with photos of his parents when they were young.

Dad is riding a bicycle, and mom is sitting in the back seat, wearing a red skirt and a white shirt. When passing a big rock, my father took a photo of my mother as a souvenir. She smiles brightly in the camera, looking like a bright girl. When it was his turn to play the role of his parents in their youth, he tried his best to restore the freshness and even madness of youth. He did not want to deliberately portray the story in a rigid and serious direction just because it was a story about his father's generation.

Xiao Zhan seems to have a special sense of time. He is nostalgic. Whether singing in variety shows and evening parties, or listening to them in private, he always has a preference for old songs. They are memorable, rich in meaning, and give him space to think.

When he was a child, he didn't have much pocket money, so Xiao Zhan would go to the video store to rent CDs, or exchange CDs and tapes with his classmates. The prices can still be clearly remembered to this day. To this day, he still has the CD player and Walkman he used back then in his home. Sometimes, he returns to wired headphones because they are convenient and easy to find. In the dead of night, he would occasionally think of objects that were gradually disappearing in the torrent of time. Being alone, with his heart flowing, is his comfortable state.

Xiao Zhan said that he is a very homely person and has to stay at home. During his spare time, he just works out and watches movies. He never regards watching movies as a task. He watches everything regardless of genre, whether it is popular movies such as popcorn movies or niche movies such as art films. Recently, he watched "The Fall", the best film at the 2023 Cannes International Film Festival.

Around New Year, he often revisits "Love Actually" and watches it again every two or three years. The reason is also very straightforward. The family, love, and friendship in the movie all convey truth, goodness and beauty, which makes people feel heart-warming when watching them.

"Don't you think that the emotions between people have never changed? Old movies will always be read and watched, and old songs will always be listened to over and over again, because the emotions sung by truly classic works remain unchanged through the ages. Only sincerity can move people." Xiao Zhan seemed to have a sudden inspiration and compared it with AI, "I think AI cannot replace humans. Maybe its technology can one day surpass the limits of humans, but that kind of complex emotions , humans far surpass computers. It can be said that humans are the most accurate, mysterious, and complex supercomputers."

Xiao Zhan will pay attention to AI, just like he pays attention to all new things in the world that are deeply related to people. He watched the news and read things written by AI. The depth of thought and logic of thinking made him incredible. Perhaps, in some job competitions, the threat of AI to human beings is already close at hand, but he still firmly believes that AI cannot replace face-to-face communication between people, whether it is immediacy or complexity.

When these distant concerns about new things are temporarily put aside, Xiao Zhan also has his own expectations for the world.

When filming "Ace Troops" a few years ago, in order to play a soldier who was concerned with the national image, Xiao Zhan observed and trained in the army for more than a week. He got up at five or six in the morning every day and ate and lived with the soldiers. After performing this play, he felt the cruelty of war and understood the hard-won peace. "I cherish my current life more. This is the truth." Xiao Zhan said. Therefore, the current vision of world peace may also be related to infinite distances and countless people.

As for his expectations for himself, he outlined it more simply: "I have done very well in 2023, and I hope I can maintain it." After thinking for a while, he added: "In 2024, I hope to love myself more and care more. Some of my own feelings and thoughts. This sentence is not only for myself, but also for everyone."

In Xiao Zhan's mind, he is different on screen and in real life. In private, he will not modify himself too much, nor will he dress too brightly. He just wants to be natural and true to himself.

"Just like the current chat, just keep it in this comfortable state. I won't change my face and play another person." Xiao Zhan said, "It's too tiring. Too tiring." He repeated twice all over.

A poet wrote, "My heart is slightly larger than the entire universe." Outside Xiao Zhan's small space, there is the restraint of "strategy" and the vastness of "universe".

LINK TO THE ARTICLE

[cherry-froggie]

will you be my valentine today?~ [headcanons]

summary — Headcanons for how some Genshin characters will spend the special day with their loved one

characters — xiao, zhongli, ayato, thoma

notes - welcome to one of those days of the year when everyone else writes about the same topic, today we will keep the trend; this is my entry to the "happy valentine's day" writing event from the @yae-publishing-house!

MASTERLIST || REQUESTS

XIAO

"A day dedicated to grating your lover with gifts and affection? Is there something special about this day that sets it apart from others?"

All Xiao ever wanted was to simply spend time in your company, free from worries or concerns, and without any distractions or interruptions that could pull you apart. He imagined the perfect Valentine's Day as not much more than a calm and serene occasion, one spent solely with his other half.

A dream that he was fully intent on achieving.

If you ever gifted him with something physical, be it a helpful tool or a small token representative of your love, he would gladly accept it before looking deeply into the windows of your soul with his eyes of vibrant amber. He would hold onto the gifted object and your hand with the most delicate touch. As the two of you exchanged kind and loving looks with one another, he was the happiest.

With a gentle whisper and the evening sun illuminating the inn, he confessed, "I only need you, not these possessions. They mean nothing to me without you by my side." He spoke with a calm smile, a hint of affection and love shimmering within his eyes. As such, he did not expect you to give him anything, not preparing a present in advance.

Do not mistake him not being the most familiar with diverse human practices as a sign that he does not care for or love you as much as you do for him; he was simply naive of the significance of the day as he only came to know about it through Verr Goldet that same morning. But rest assured that he will never forget this day ever again.

However, if you prefer a physical gift, he would take the time to teach you the intricate and delicate art of how to make a butterfly out of nothing but ordinary and simple leaves or offer the rare opportunity to walk around Liyue's vibrant and beautiful fields until he found a flower that he deemed worthy of your beauty, which he would then proudly place on your hair.

Creating something together brought a smile across his lips as he felt his heart swell with joy.

To Xiao, love was all about the memories and moments that formed between you.

ZHONGLI

"It's a day to celebrate the love in our lives and to show appreciation for the special people in it, a reminder that love is a beautiful and powerful thing, and it's important to hold on to it."

Zhongli envisioned the perfect Valentine's Day to be a day filled with leisure and relaxation. He pictured himself walking down the city's beautiful walkways while holding hands with you and talking about everything that made him smile and laugh, taking in the sights and sounds of the many stores and vendors that passed you by. The mere thought of you brought a sense of joy to his heart, and he was almost lost in thought, so much so that his mind was empty and quiet.

You would then stop off at the Wanmin restaurant, and a most delicious, mouthwatering meal awaited the two of you, accompanied by the stories the storyteller had to offer.

You would sit down, relax and slowly enjoy the food you ordered, savoring every bite you took. The peaceful atmosphere served as the perfect backdrop for a romantic conversation, one that would allow the two of you to talk about your days and reflect on the beauty of the day in a moment of affection.

As a token of his love for you, he would gift you a beautiful jade hairpin, a symbol of his devotion, a small and delicate gesture to be nothing more than a sweet surprise, one that would allow him to look on with contentment as you wore the jade hairpin with pride.

The beautifully deep and rich jade hairpin, intricately crafted, would have swirling designs that spiraled around it. It would shine in the light like morning dew, representing not just his fondness but his respect and admiration for the beauty and grace that you possessed.

It would be a rare and cherished keepsake, treasured for many years. Indeed, for a lifetime.

Zhongli is a man with both distinct and unique tastes, a person who could identify and even pinpoint things with nothing but the slightest and most faint touch.

He would not expect anything more than a good conversation and the mere act of enjoying one another's company. He was content with simply existing and coexisting with you, no matter the occasion.

If you were to gift him with something, whatever it may be, then he would be overjoyed, grateful to be in the presence of such a wonderful person and lifetime companion.

AYATO

"Love is a precious and important aspect of life. Although I find it a bit excessive to have a specific day dedicated to expressing love, the most important thing is that love is cherished and appreciated, no matter how it is done."

Valentine's Day was of great importance for Ayato since it was a perfect time to celebrate and share the love of his life while escaping from all the duties as he could focus solely on his relationship. His perfect day would be filled with happiness, laughter, and love; one filled with joy and contentment that he would never forget. He wished for this to be a time when he and you could finally connect more intimately.

Ayato would love to spend quality time with you and was nothing but excited for the experience ahead. The two of you would walk across the city's streets as he would feel himself growing in anticipation for your future together.

You stopped at various sites and landmarks, admiring the magnificence of the nature-made wonders that had been erected on the ground you were standing on. The city of Inazuma was a visual marvel to behold; one that many tourists and photographers alike flocked to just to see its natural beauty and unique landscapes.

As he stood before you, the sun's rays burst forth from behind him, illuminating his figure and highlighting his stunning beauty. With each passing moment, his silhouette grew stronger and more radiant, casting an inviting glow that seemed to envelop you in its comforting embrace. Despite the sheer majesty of his presence, there was an understated elegance to his every move, a humble grace. He stood tall and proud, with a confidence that could only be born from knowing that he was truly loved and appreciated. And as you gazed upon him, basking in the radiance of his light, you knew deep in your heart that this was the moment you would always treasure. "My dearest," he began, his voice rich and tranquil, "As we stand here, I am reminded of the many wonders and beauties of this world. And yet, you outshine them all."

You would savor the taste of joy and delight at the moment together, even when the time seemed to slow to a crawl.

Your day would be nothing but joy, and you could find yourselves in an endless state of tranquility and pleasure in one another's presence. There was no rush; you could spend day and night together if it so pleased you. It was all about loving and appreciating each other's presence in whatever way you could.

Ayato was more than grateful for the opportunity to experience such an event with someone as gracious and loving as you. He knew the memories you would make would last forever. Indeed, one thing that Ayato had always loved about you was your natural ability to make him smile so effortlessly.

He contemplated for a while what he would desire from you during this day and found that one gift that would win him over was a delicious cup of milk tea medley especially prepared by you. Such a simple and thoughtful gift would touch his heart.

To him, a gift that would be enough to bring a smile to your face was a bouquet. Nothing too grand or fancy, he just wished for a simple and considerate present; one that would be all he needed to show his deep admiration and devotion.

As the day would finally come to a close, you would sit down and partake in a delicious meal that had been lovingly and carefully prepared by Thoma's hands. He would decorate the room with candles, flowers, and an assortment of exquisite tableware so the setting would be perfect for such a special occasion. He would design the perfect meal with the utmost care, combining elegant cuisine with a gorgeous presentation. The entire scene would create an intimacy and warmth that only you could experience together, leading Ayato to feel a deep sense of overwhelming gratitude and love for you.

You would talk, laugh, and enjoy each other's company over a delicious home-cooked meal, and Ayato would think back to all the times he had felt complete and satisfied while in the presence of his beloved.

THOMA

"For me, it's all about making those special to you feel valued and appreciated through small gestures with meaning behind them that touch the heart and warm it up."

Thoma was always a hopeless romantic. He was planning something big to show his love and affection for you.

One surprise he had planned was to take the entire day off from his usual daily activities to spend some time with the one he loved most. He wanted to dedicate the day to you, his much-deserved partner, and he planned to create many new and wonderful memories together.

Thoma's lovely and secret home for the local dogs and kitties is a fascinating site, and he was more than willing to show off his little slice of paradise to you. The cute kittens and the adorable pups were simply the perfect addition to the already heavenly scenery, and Thoma knew that this secret hiding spot was one he could never keep hidden from you.

You would take in the pleasing scenery around you, taking the time to appreciate the stunning natural beauty of it all and the endearing nature of the many animals that inhabited the area. The perfect blend of joy and excitement, combined with the breathtaking nature of the surrounding areas, would bring forth an unforgettable experience and a precious memory to hold onto forever.

As you walked through the countryside hand in hand, you would find yourselves in utter awe and bewilderment at the scenic Inazuman landscape. You would feel the serene breeze brush against your faces and marvel at the lush and lively green grass all around you. You would delightfully take in the fresh country air and the calming peace that awaited you. Thoma would point out the various creatures that populated and dominated the surrounding nature. You would discuss your aspirations and ideals, visions of the future, and hopes for the time ahead.

As the sun would set, Thoma would surprise you with a delicious and romantic dinner, beautifully decorated and lovingly prepared.

You knew he enjoyed escaping into the pages of a good book and finding himself lost in the world of fantasy and imagination that awaited him at the turn of every page. What better gift to give him on such a day than the new works from the Yae Publishing House?

No matter the book, he would find himself deeply invested in the plot and story, no matter how fantastical or unrealistic it may be. He would spend an entire afternoon, or even the full day, just being lost in his imagination as he read and immersed himself in a different world, a world that only existed between two covers, a world gifted from you.

His strength is as grand and unshakable as his faith in love; however, the inside of his heart is as soft and vulnerable as a small kitten. Any loving words directed toward him with such great affection will bring out a side with pleasure and tenderness. Such a proclamation may also be a little overwhelming and surprising, so he might not be able to muster up the courage to say anything in response immediately, but he will be sure to say anything to make you even redder than him.

proof read? no aaaaaaaaa im too tired im sorry i canNOT

and as you read this you think to yourself "another one? where is the epilogue for the forgotten puppet, that kaeya fic promised more than a month ago, the second part of the jealousy headcanons, the 100-follower special fanfic?" LIKE YES I KNOW I KNOW IM SORRY IM TOO MUCH OF A PERFECTIONIST I TAKE LIKE 1 OR 2 DAYS DEDICATED TO WRITE A FULL FIC

"xiao's part is now short" to contrast his height, xiao is the tallest character in the hit game genshin impact I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW I MADE THOMAS PART SO LONG (like xiao)

i'm sorry i AHAHA i need to regain my mental stability THANK YOU EVERYONE SPEND THE DAY IMPACTING GENSHIN CHARACTER'S LOVE LIVES

[xiaosspear]

an eternity without you part VI || xiao x reader

-

You expected the place Xiao was taking you to be nearby, but it turned into a full day of walking, evading the Fatui, and flying over mountains in Xiao’s arms.

Finally, you land in Inazuma, atop Tenshukaku.

"Why are we in Inazuma?" you ask, frustration evident in your voice. You had repeatedly asked Xiao where you were going, but he had ignored you each time.

Xiao sets you down, his expression stern. "There’s nothing to show you," he says, his tone edged with impatience. "Can't you see how dangerous your situation is? There's no point in you staying in Liyue right now. You'll draw unnecessary attention to yourself."

His gaze softens slightly as he continues, "I want you to stay here for a while. When the talk dies down and Childe leaves, I'll come back for you. Then you can return to Liyue."

You look at him, surprised by the mixture of concern and frustration in his eyes. "Xiao, I can’t just hide away here. I want to help, to be by your side."

Xiao turns away, his shoulders tense. "Your presence in Liyue right now is a danger—to you and to everyone else. Trust me on this. Stay here. I'll handle things in Liyue."

A lump forms in your throat, but you nod in understanding, looking at Xiao with sadness in your eyes. As he prepares to take off once again, you call out, "Hey -wait."

Xiao pauses, tilting his head slightly to glance back at you. You rarely got attached to people, but saying goodbye to him felt surprisingly difficult, even though you knew you’d see him again. You take a hesitant step closer, the urge to fall into his arms for a tight hug growing stronger. You push those thoughts away, thinking, "No, he sticks around because Zhongli told him to. He probably doesn’t even see me as a friend."

Taking a deep breath, you muster your courage and speak up, "Stay safe, okay?"

Xiao's eyes soften as he nods, turning back around. He stands there for a moment, then, in a barely audible whisper, says, "I do." With a powerful kick, he launches himself off the Tenshukaku roof. In an instant, the teal trail and the faint scent of Qingxin flowers are gone.

You furrow your brows, puzzled at how he heard you. The confusion quickly gives way to a faint smile as you realize, "So he does see me as a friend and not just as a burden."

You make your way down from the rooftop, hopping gracefully from roofs to poles, your adeptus abilities making the descent effortless. As your feet touch the ground, familiar faces come into view. Their expressions light up with joy, mirroring your own happiness at seeing them again. Ayaka and Thoma, ever the gracious hosts, quickly organize a small gathering in your honor.

The evening is filled with laughter and warmth. The courtyard is adorned with lanterns, casting a soft, inviting glow over the scene. Tables are laden with delicious Inazuman delicacies, and the air is filled with the scent of fresh sakura blossoms.

As you sit surrounded by friends, you begin to recount your recent adventures. You describe the various monsters you've faced, the challenges you've overcome, and the new skills you've honed. Ayaka listens intently, her eyes wide with admiration. Itto occasionally interjects with a humorous comment, making everyone laugh.

The night progresses with the exchange of stories and experiences. You hear about the latest happenings in Inazuma, the small victories, and the day-to-day lives of your friends. The sense of camaraderie is palpable, and for a moment, the worries and dangers you’ve been facing seem far away.

As the evening winds down, you find yourself sitting by the water's edge, gazing at the reflection of the moon. Ayaka joins you, offering a cup of warm tea. "It's good to have you back," she says softly.

You smile, feeling a deep sense of belonging. Despite the looming threats and uncertainties, moments like these remind you of why you fight and who you fight for. The bonds of friendship and the shared memories make all the hardships worthwhile.

You say, "I'm so glad to be back. I missed everyone so much... I don't know how long I will stay here."

Ayaka looks at you with a knowing smile. "Xiao is strong and resourceful. He’ll find a way to come back for you. In the meantime, you have all of us here."

You nod, comforted by her words, but a part of you still aches with uncertainty. "I know. It's just... hard to be away, especially when things are so uncertain."

Heizou joins the two of you, bringing a warmth to the conversation. "Hey, we'll make sure you have plenty to do to keep your mind off things. And who knows? Maybe your little yaksha will be back sooner than you think."

You chuckle softly, appreciating their support. "Thanks, Heizou. I guess I just need to be patient."

As the night deepens, you decide to walk around Inazuma alone, feeling a pull to visit your grandmother's house where you once lived. The familiar streets bring back memories, and you hope to find some comfort there. As you make your way through the quiet, moonlit paths, the sound of people speaking Russian catches your attention.

Your heart sinks, recognizing the language of the Fatui.

Peeking from behind a neighboring house, your worst fears are confirmed.

The Fatui are scavenging through your grandmother's house, tossing belongings aside in their search for anything related to your condition. The sight of your grandmother's cherished home being ransacked brings tears to your eyes, but you know you can't afford to blow your cover.

You turn and run back into the now silent city, the night air cool against your face as tears stream down your cheeks. Seeking solace, you climb up to a secluded mountain spot and sit down, looking at the moon and the horizon.

The beauty of the scene offers a small measure of comfort. You find peace in the thought that Xiao, wherever he is, is looking at the same moon.

As you sit there, the weight of the situation presses down on you. The Fatui's relentless pursuit has reached even the sacred spaces of your past.

You whisper a silent promise to the moon, to stay strong and to reunite with him soon.

The night grows deeper, and the stars begin to dot the sky. The quietness of the mountain and the distant sounds of the ocean provide a soothing backdrop to your troubled thoughts.

You wipe away your tears, determined to face whatever comes next with the strength you've gained from your journey and the support of your friends. And with the moon as your witness, you vow to protect those you care about and find a way to overcome the challenges ahead.

-

-

A few weeks pass, and with each night, your longing for Xiao intensifies. There are no signs or messages from him, and the uncertainty gnaws at your heart. However, you refuse to let this weigh you down. Determined to stay strong, you spend most of your days overworking yourself—practicing combat skills, refining strategies, and learning how to make the most of your Hydro Vision.

The familiar surroundings of Inazuma become your training ground, and you push yourself harder with each passing day. Ei, who has always been like a mother figure to you, offers her guidance.

Her lessons are invaluable, and her presence is a source of comfort and strength. She teaches you not only the art of combat but also the importance of patience and perseverance.

Under her watchful eye, you learn to harness your vision more effectively. You become more attuned to the flow of water, using it to create powerful attacks and defensive maneuvers.

Each practice session brings you closer to mastering your abilities, and the progress you make is a testament to your dedication.

Despite your rigorous training, the nights remain difficult. The loneliness is palpable, and you find yourself often gazing at the moon, wondering if Xiao is looking at the same sky. The thought of him brings a mix of comfort and longing, and you hold onto the hope that he will return soon.

-

-

It was nighttime. You and Kazuha were sitting on Beidou's ship, which was now empty, waiting for the morning to come to carry cargo and passengers.

Kazuha had just finished rolling up some naku weed in a dried sakura bloom petal, lighting it up with a small campfire you two had made on the deck. You were lying close by on your back, staring at the moon.

"Didn't you smoke just now? Calm down," you teased Kazuha with slight concern in your voice.

Kazuha exhaled a soft laugh, the smoke curling up into the night sky. "I'm too far off now. It takes me like three of these to feel something. Beidou told me to go on a tolerance break, but that made me want to jump off this same ship on day two. On the other hand, I bet you'd be out of it after a few hits," he mocked playfully.

You chuckled, shaking your head. "Maybe you're right. I'm not as seasoned as you, Kazuha."

He smirked, taking another drag and looking out over the calm sea. "It's a strange kind of peace, being out here on the open water. Almost makes you forget everything else."

You nodded, the gentle rocking of the ship and the soft sound of the waves adding to the serene atmosphere. "Yeah, it's nice. Makes you feel like you're a part of something bigger, doesn't it?"

Kazuha glanced at you, a thoughtful look in his eyes. "It does. The sea, the sky, the stars... It all puts things in perspective."

Kazuha passes the joint to you, and you take a drag, inhaling deeply and holding it in, as the fragrant smoke swirls around in the night air. The glow of the campfire casts flickering shadows on the deck of Beidou's ship, lending a serene ambiance to the scene.

You and Kazuha have been conversing for hours now, sharing both profound insights and lighthearted banter under the moonlit sky.

After some time, the weight of the day's events and the soothing effects of the naku weed begin to settle in. You feel a pleasant warmth spreading through your body, easing the tension that had been building up inside you. The conversations meander from philosophical musings about life and purpose to playful debates about the best way to enjoy a quiet evening.

As the night progresses, you find yourself drifting into a reflective mood. You reach out beside you, fingers brushing over the cool deck until they close around the Qingxin flower you had found earlier that day.

Bringing it to your nose, you inhale its delicate fragrance—a reminder of the tranquil moments spent in Liyue, where Xiao's presence had brought a sense of calm amidst the chaos.

The scent triggers memories of Xiao—his stoic demeanor, his unwavering dedication to protecting others, and the rare glimpses of vulnerability he had shown. You remember the quiet moments shared together, the unspoken understanding that had developed between you, and the bond that had formed despite the challenges you faced.

Kazuha notices the pensive look on your face and shifts closer, his own expression thoughtful yet gentle. "What's on your mind?" he asks softly, his voice carrying a soothing cadence.

You glance at him, a mix of emotions playing in your eyes. "This flower... it reminds me of someone important to me. Someone I had to leave behind," you admit, your voice tinged with longing.

Kazuha nods empathetically, his gaze turning towards the distant horizon. "Distance can be difficult, especially when it separates us from those we care about deeply. But sometimes, it's the separation that strengthens our bonds and deepens our appreciation for the moments we share."

You sigh softly, twirling the Qingxin flower between your fingers. "I miss him," you confess quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. "I wonder where he is now, what he's doing, if he's thinking about me too..."

"He's out there," Kazuha assures you gently, his words carrying a sense of reassurance. "He is resilient, and he knows how to navigate through challenges. And when the time is right, fate will bring you together again."

You find comfort in Kazuha's words, feeling a sense of solace amidst the uncertainty. The tranquility of the night envelops you, the gentle lull of the waves against the ship's hull and the distant calls of nocturnal creatures creating a serene backdrop.

The Qingxin flower's fragrance continues to linger in the air, intertwining with your thoughts of Xiao and anchoring you to the memories you hold dear.

As the night deepens and weariness settles in, you lean back against the ship's railing, cradling the Qingxin flower in your hand. "Thank you, Kazuha," you murmur gratefully, a small smile playing on your lips. "For listening, for understanding, for the... weed?."

Kazuha smiles warmly in return, his eyes reflecting the moonlight as he nods. "Anytime," he replies softly. "Rest now. Tomorrow holds new possibilities."

With Kazuha's comforting presence beside you and thoughts of Xiao in your heart, you allow yourself to surrender to sleep, the Qingxin flower still clasped gently in your hand.

In that moment, surrounded by the peaceful night and the camaraderie of friends, you find solace in knowing that despite the physical distance, the bond you share with Xiao remains steadfast and enduring.

Tonight was surprisingly devoid of nightmares, a welcome relief. Instead, a dream had visited—a blurry yet comforting vision of Liyue, its landscapes painted with memories of new friends, and of Xiao. The tranquility of the dream was abruptly shattered as a dull ache in your head jolted you awake.

Opening your eyes, the blurry figure before you materialized into Beidou, who tossed an apple your way with a mix of jest and irritation. "Good morning, beautiful," she quipped. "So, while I entrusted you with guarding my ship, you and Kazuha decided to get high and then catch up on beauty sleep?"

Her playful sarcasm was laced with an undercurrent of mild disapproval, yet you sensed that Kazuha was likely to bear the brunt of her displeasure.

As you rubbed your temples, memories of the hazy night of shared laughter and deep conversations with Kazuha flooded back, mingling with the remnants of the dream that had slipped away like morning mist.

Despite Beidou's teasing, you knew her trust in you extended beyond occasional slip-ups. But as you glanced at the horizon tinged with the first rays of dawn, thoughts of Liyue and the friends left behind weighed heavily on your mind.

As the calming tune of Kazuha's Shibabue emitted from the ship's watchtower, you bid him and Beidou farewell with a wave before disembarking. The morning air was cool and inviting, and you sought a quiet spot to relax. Just as you began to wander, you noticed Heizou sprinting towards you, waving his arms frantically. Sensing urgency, you paused and waited for him to catch up.

Heizou reached you, his hand on his shoulder as he gasped for breath, clearly flustered but determined to convey something important. With a swift motion, he pulled out photos from his kamera and held them out to you.

"You might want to see this," he managed between breaths.

Taking the photos, your heart sank as you studied them intently. Your jaw dropped in disbelief as the images revealed something you feared was true..

[fortheloveofarchons]

Xiao comforts Aether in the Serenitea Pot

C.W. - Fluff and angst - Aether is so done - Aether needs therapy - Xiao being kind - Kiss!

Aether sighs, looking around his own serenitea pot, his feelings mixed with emotions of proudness and tiredness. It’s been a long day for the traveller, and all he’s been doing is decorating and furnishing his little teapot realm. 

Aether then whips out his furnishing blueprint, which was titled as the, ‘Chorus of Desert and Wood’. 

With leaves that resemble the contours of starlights, lush and demure plants with brightly coloured flowers, some purple plants that grow in clusters like a dense bush, these components pair well with the fountain. To Aether, the fountain is made to be exactly like the one that’s in front of the Zubayr Theater in Sumeru, where he once saw Nilou’s performance and it was where him, Paimon and the other Sumeru companions held a feast together from the victory of overthrowing the sages. 

Its fountain mist is able to bring a cool breeze to the audience, including himself, whose face is gently sprinkled with water. 

With these components, it all creates a beautiful chorus of flowers, trees, and some wild grass. 

In front of the fountain, lies a dream-like aura furnishing item called the ‘Floral Swing’. 

The suspended cloud-like chair is supported by the gracefully-curved trees, the seat that were held by vibrant vines are twisted into ropes, while the trunks and beams are dotted with clusters of blue and white flowers that exude a pervasive fragrance capable of carrying people off to a floral sea in the clouds. 

“I think I did a pretty good job!” He says, admiring his new furnishing set. Thanks to the placements, the grass also growed wonderfully, without any unnecessary weeds growing. 

“If only Paimon was here to see this…” 

~~~~~~

Meanwhile, Paimon is snoring loudly in her little bedroom, sprawling across the bed in a messy tangle of limbs and blankets. One arm hangs off the side of the bed, while the other is tucked awkwardly beneath Paimon’s own body. Paimon’s tousled white hair sticks out in all directions, evidence of a day filled with play and adventure.

“Ehe~ eheheheh~” The emergency food’s face is relaxed in sleep, with a slight smile playing at the corners of Paimon’s mouth, perhaps dreaming of mountains of food or mora. 

 “More… more food… bring in more food… yummy…” 

…Right. 

~~~~~~

Settling himself onto the floral swing, he pushes his legs from the ground, gently swaying amidst the blossoming flowers. 

“If only Lumine was here…” Aether says it to himself. Surrounded by the vibrant colours of Sumeru’s nature, the immortal traveller is lost in contemplation, the shine in his golden eyes reflecting a depth of loneliness that only eternity could bring. 

Each petal and leaves that dance in the breeze whisper tales of fleeting life, contrasting sharply with the immortality of the Fourth Descender’s existence. 

As the swing gently rocks back and forth, making a little creaking sound, reality seemed to flicker and fade in his eyes, like an old film reel skipping frames. Travelling and venturing into many worlds, he and his kin watched as the seasons changed, flowers around them bloomed and withered, people growing old and passing by, and life ebbed and flowed around them. Yet to him and his sister, they remained unchanged, forever separated from mortal existence, both twins burdened with the weight of endless years. 

Despite the vibrant surroundings, Aether felt an emptiness in his heart that no amount of furnishing sets and nature splendours could fill. Ever since he and his twin sister were separated, he has longed for companionship, for someone to share in anything he could ever think of. 

But he knew that such a connection was impossible no matter what. 

“If only there was someone who could see this with me…” Aether says. 

The first person that came to his mind was someone with a purple diamond marking on the forehead, and a familiar green tattoo around their right arm. 

“Don’t be ridiculous…” Aether gives himself a laugh, adjusting the white scarf on his neck. “There’s no way Xiao could even appear in this teapot realm.” 

Under his own little rambling, the golden-haired immortal didn’t hear the gust of the wispy black smoke coming from behind him. 

“I mean– Xiao is always so busy extinguishing demons, he probably doesn’t even have time to deal with… What does he call them again? Oh! Right!” Aether tries to mimic Xiao’s voice, making his voice a bit more deeper. “I have no time to deal with your mortal affairs. How absurd of you, I’d rather eat snow than stay in your company– Unless you have a plate of almond tofu, of course.” 

That made the yaksha’s brows furrow tightly, crossing his arms.  

“If you awake to a knife at your throat!! If monsters dig their claws into you!!” Aether starts bolting out a song out of nowhere, his voice crackling and bolting with every note. A tuneless melody that’s out of sync. “If death comes knocking at your door!!!” 

Xiao glances around the realm at nothing, as though he might see something that would explain this. 

“Call out my name!! Da dum da dum!! Adeptus Xiao!! Da dum da dum!!” Aether continues. “I will be here!!! Right when you call–” 

Squeeeezeeeee…

Aether could feel a rough pinch on both of his cheeks, halting whatever song he was singing out loud. 

“Eh?” 

“Are you done singing?” Xiao asks near Aether’s ear, leaning in close. “Perhaps this would be enough to shut you up. By the way, why exactly did you call me?” 

“Oh, Xiao!” Aether lets out an awkward laugh, his cheeks turning to a light tint of red due to the squeeze. “I… Uh… I missed you?” 

“Hmm? Why would you miss me? I” Xiao gives a confused hum in response and lets go of Aether’s cheeks. “I mean– Why would you miss me, of all the people you’ve met?” 

Aether’s cheeks are now flushed as pink as a rainbow rose.....

Full version down below!!!

[glorious-sunset]

Reflections on Ep. 6 of LBFAD on rewatch

Arbiter Hall, Day 6: DongFang QingCang (DFQC) has discovered that the greenhouse flowers are connected to Xiao Lanhua’s (XLH) mood, thus, tending to her heart as well as her body are vital to her full recovery. As she waters her greenhouse that morning wearing the lavender gown he had created for her, he asks her what she likes and wants, that he would bring her anything within the three realms that she asked for. The only thing XLH can think of is that she wants her Da Qiang to be safe. Since their first night together, she had been in constant terror of him being discovered and executed, which had manifested as a terrifying nightmare. She offers to make his favourite food and fix the destiny leaf if he will turn himself in, thus sparing himself from execution for deserting. But as usual he just rolls his eyes.

DFQC needs the destiny leaf to be repaired, but XLH has not yet made a full recovery. To his surprise, he does not mind waiting another few days. Since XLH had discovered his sweet tooth on their second day together, she made pretty flower-shaped cakes for him every day in assorted flavours. He was, of course, used to the finest cuisine and pastries made by the best chefs across Cangyan Sea. But when he ate XLH’s flower cakes, she smiled and gazed at him fondly in a way nobody else ever had.

XLH was indeed very fond of Da Qiang, but never forgot that he was an escaped criminal who would one day be gone. She needed to pursue her dream to pass the fairies’ examination and work at Fountain Palace, so she told him that was the only other thing that she wanted. Sitting close to him, she felt comfortable enough to admit to him her secret crush on Changheng (CH). He looked away in annoyance as she praised CH but was gentle in his rebuke that CH did not deserve to be compared to the Moon Supreme. “There are a lot of beauties in the three realms” XLH told him earnestly. She still thought her heart belonged to CH, but wanted Da Qiang to be happy. With his looks, intellect and irresistible kindness, any woman would certainly be very lucky to have him.

“To benzuo, nobody in the three realms is as unique as Xiao Hua Yao” DFQC replied sourly. This little demon had cursed him and was the only one capable of repairing Lady Chidi’s destiny leaf. He had tried to lift the curse and fix the damned leaf himself without success. Yet, she was unique in other ways too. Unlike most celestials, she did not unthinkingly abide by the heavenly laws. She had not reported an escaped prisoner, and instead, had treated him with kindness.

XLH, caught off-guard by this seemingly adoring proclamation, tried not to lead him on. “The one I like is CH, not you,” she said as he looked hurt, “and I want CH to be by my side, not you!” As she leaves, DFQC considers what she says. XLH’s happiness and recovery are crucial to his goals, so perhaps he should give her what she wants…and pretend to be CH? CH is her dream lover, and he is now forced to consider what being a lover actually means. There are more than a few romance novels lying around Arbiter Hall, some raunchier than others…so this is why XLH hadn’t wanted to share his bed that first night. He wonders what it would be like to kiss her soft lips again…

Haishi: Dieyi has discovered the identity of the thief who stole Lady Chidi’s destiny leaf to be XLH! To avoid suspicion, Ronghao decides to kill her during the upcoming fairies’ examination and make it look like an accident.

Arbiter Hall, Day 7: XLH wakes naturally, still wearing her beloved lavender gown from Da Qiang, to find a grumpy CH seated close by her bedside peering at her intently. How long had he been there observing her and waiting for her to wake?! She can’t quite believe he came here “to be with her”, but when he states that “benzuo will stay by your side in this form from now on”, it all makes sense. A little relieved, she forces him to shed his disguise! The handsome CH in bland white robes morphs back into an infinitely more striking DFQC in bejewelled turquoise robes. He offers to tie up the real CH and bring him here if it will make XLH happy! :D Of course not! cries XLH, half afraid that he will actually do it. That would only put DFQC in danger (she believes) and protecting him is the most important thing to her.

Shuyu Forest: Supreme Liyuan finds his daughter Danyin overdoing her magic practice for the fairies’ examination, much to his displeasure. He has indulged her too much since the loss of his wife and other daughter. The foolish girl won’t give up her naïve fantasy that she can be with CH! He is terrified that she will follow in his footsteps and pursue a doomed relationship. If he himself hadn’t pursued his wife, who had been from the Moon Tribe and thus forbidden to him, she wouldn’t have ended up trying to flee from celestial soldiers while in the excruciating throes of childbirth. His heart ached when he thought of the suffering she had gone through due his selfish pursuit of her. He had no idea whether she was even alive, or what had become of their other daughter.

Arbiter Hall, Day 9: Over the past few days, DFQC had spent hours every day training XLH to improve her powers for the fairies' examination. But her progress has been slow. As she leaves after a training session, he complains to Shangque (SQ) that it is difficult to improve her cultivation. He never expected taking care of a plant would be more difficult than conquering the whole world! But surely there is no challenge that he cannot surmount? He will do whatever it takes to make XLH the happiest woman in the world! To aid her recovery (and since he shares her emotions, to make himself the happiest man in the world!) :D He has decided to be present at the exam to help her win first place.

Danyin arrives. XLH, concerned for DFQC’s safety, makes him conceal himself during her visit. Danyin is widely regarded as the most beautiful fairy in all of Shuiyuntian, and is intelligent and powerful, but DFQC only views her as a threat to his Xiao Hua Yao. He is immune to the charms of any woman apart from XLH, including the beautiful Xie Wanqing and Danyin. He loves XLH only because she loves him so much.

Danyin demands her destiny leaf to see if she can enter Fountain Palace (and have a future with CH). Be careful what you wish for Danyin! Danyin’s actions of damaging the Destiny tree open the Tianji mirror for her. To her shock, she sees XLH marrying her prince, CH, not once, but twice! She is unable to reconcile these visions with the timid and powerless cry-baby before her, and shoves XLH down violently. Once she has stormed off, DFQC gently helps XLH to her feet and smirks at the thought of being able to kill Danyin for her. But she quickly makes clear her preference for non-violence.

DFQC is confused – surely eliminating any potential threat would be the easiest option? He is angered by Danyin’s treatment of Xiao Hua Yao and doesn’t want to see a repeat of it at the exam tomorrow. Choosing non-violence is far more difficult and unnatural for him, but if it is what makes her happy, it is what he must do. From here on, he chooses to adhere to her wishes for non-violence even in situations where it would definitely be in the interests of the Moon Tribe to choose violence. As early as eps. 8 and 9, he places his love for XLH far higher among his values and priorities than his responsibilities towards the Moon Tribe, when he chooses not to kill CH and not to kill the High Council of Shuiyuntian in these respective episodes.

Yujing, Day 10: XLH arrives for the fairies’ examination wearing the lavender gown DFQC created for good luck (minus a frilly neckline overlay). She hears rumours that CH has been in seclusion making an Immortal Pill to help a certain fairy with her examination. Some details are wrong, such as how long he was in seclusion and which fairy it was (they all think it was Danyin – did she spread these rumours herself?). Danyin arrives and regards XLH appraisingly. She has been thinking about it and wonders whether, somehow, XLH is the Goddess of Xishan who went missing and is actually CH’s fiancée? (she asks her father about this possibility in ep. 12).

Ronghao arrives late after setting up his assassination attempt on XLH and correctly guesses that CH’s secret crush is among the assembled fairies. Yunzhong carefully eavesdrops on their every exchange. He is not unsympathetic to CH’s plight. As a member of the ruling family, Yunzhong himself had to sacrifice the love of his life to fulfil his responsibilities. That is why he allowed CH to keep the handkerchief of his love as a memento, on the strict understanding that CH’s duties must always come first. CH’s engagement to the Goddess is vital to protecting the three realms from the ultimate evil Taisui, who if released, would consume everything in its terrifying wake.

As CH hands out Demon Pills, he is careful to avoid Danyin’s gaze, to her disappointment. For XLH, however, he tries to seek out her gaze, softly whispering “be careful”. As the judges watch the examination in Shuyu Forest through the Kuitian mirror, he is constantly worried for her safety and wishes to rush to her aid when a private fight breaks out, and when they see a giant Yingzhao possessed by the evil qi. As per usual, CH is unable to do these things, but XLH’s dark knight, DFQC, always appears by her side to protect her.

XLH has spent the last few days reading about the characteristics of various demons, and their strengths and weaknesses. She recognises that the Yingzhao which SQ placed in her path likes to eat the plant Hounds tongue, which she has carefully brought along. Yingzhao, appreciating her kindness and recognising the rare purity of her spirit, indicates that she should use her Demon Pill on him. He growls at the other fairies, however, when they show up to bully XLH. An invisible DFQC, showing amazing restraint, blasts the fairies away without singeing a single hair on their heads with his hellfire (he is not so gentle with Dieyi in ep. 7). XLH believes this feeble blast came from her and can’t believe how strong she has become! :D

DFQC leaves to investigate the evil qi he has sensed, asking SQ to guard XLH with his life. While he is away, the gentle Yingzhao becomes possessed by the evil qi, turning into a gigantic raging overpowered monster! SQ knocks Yingzhao away from XLH, but he then terrorises the other fairies. The kind and caring XLH cannot leave them in the interests of her own safety! She saves Danyin, and the fairies team up to bind Yingzhao with their powers. They can’t contain him for long, and XLH takes charge. Demonstrating natural leadership skills, she directs the fairies into a hollow tree, persuades them to give her their Demon Pills, and uses herself as a decoy to lure Yingzhao away! She cuts her wrist to attract Yingzhao’s attention, alerting DFQC, who suffers the same injury through the one-heart curse.

Full credit to @justarabidlittleyingzhao for Yunzhong's backstory headcanon!

Here is a link to my episode 7 review (contains spoilers). All of my LBFAD articles and episode reviews can be viewed with the tag #lbfad reflections (hyperlinked) and the table of contents to these is here.

[steppingonyourshadow]

Selected excerpts from Marie Claire January 2024

It's difficult to miss Xiao Zhan's strong sense of boundaries. When being interviewed, he will constantly say, "if I may put it that way", either as a question or confirmation for himself. He's also constantly reflecting on himself.

For example, constantly reminding himself not to perform from habit, as becoming too accustomed was a slippery slope to the dreaded state of inertia. Like the way he constantly emphasises that he has no interest in putting on an air of mystery, there were many things he had yet to learn, and he was merely sharing his honest, everyday feelings. And like his response to hearing a crew member say he was tireless in pursuit of excellence - that he had yet to reach "excellence" and was only pursuing "better".

Xiao Zhan doesn't speak rapidly, but with fluid eloquence, not with an explosive, fiery temperament. Like pleasant idle chit-chat, with a bit of the classical air of a learned Confucian gentleman.

And he's not even a little tense. Willing to talk about every topic under the sun, and when he's particularly satisfied, he leans back in the chair, holding his right leg loosely with both hands. The conversation ranges from the always resonant emotion contained in classic songs, to AI, our view of humanity, and his experiences in life and acting.

Xiao Chunsheng of "Where Dreams Begin" was a role that felt fresh, because he was so obviously different from Xiao Zhan's own character.

Xiao Chunsheng is a young man from the 70s, whose environment and upbringing could not be more distinct from Xiao Zhan's own. Military coats, "two-eight" bicycles, the ice rink of Shichahai, growing from a callow youth into a middle-aged leader of industry, none of this was familiar to Xiao Zhan.

Even now, traces of Xiao Chunsheng can still be found in Xiao Zhan. When speaking of one of the characters, Chen Hongjun, he kept using "Hongjun-er". That's the Beijing accent he learned for the role: using "er" at the end, "aiyowei" and "huo" as exclamations - these were once a constant refrain for Xiao Zhan.

Language and the time setting aside, the biggest difference between Xiao Zhan and Xiao Chunsheng is in personality. Xiao Zhan is an introvert who enjoys being alone, and Xiao Chunsheng is the complete opposite - he makes friends everywhere and loves to make things happen. Using today's standards, this kind of enthusiasm often translates to a person with a poor sense of boundaries.

"Times change more and more rapidly; today's youth all live fast-placed lives, and won't casually breach each other's boundaries," Xiao Zhan remarked. "But Xiao Chunsheng is a total busybody, which means he can easily cause offence."

When he first read the script, Xiao Zhan was pretty worried about this and felt that it would be hard to make Xiao Chunsheng likable. But after his initial hesitation, it occurred to him that what we need might well be hidden within the traits we mind to the most.

"Vivid", that's how Xiao Zhan describes Xiao Chunsheng and others of his generation. "Unabashed about what they can't stand, what they like. Don't you think they're especially vivid in all their colours and shades?" he asked. Even now, when he thinks of some of the scenes in Where Dreams Begins, the characters still have a vibrant, brilliant glow to them.

Playing Xiao Chunsheng, whose values were some distance from those of today, was rewarding for Xiao Zhan in another way: he learned not to be afraid of making mistakes. He says, "a truly likable character isn't perfect."

During filming he asked the director whether a busybody like Xiao Chunsheng would come across as really annoying. The director told him that this annoying tendency is what makes Xiao Chunsheng, and what makes him an appealing character.

The director's words made Xiao Zhan recognise the trap of wanting to avoid or correct imperfections in his characters. "When you do this, you rob the character of their appeal," Xiao Zhan says, "So I think when getting to know a character there's no need to be afraid, if they're over-enthusiastic then let them be, if they're a boundary-pusher then go with that. If you get stuck on a character's flaws and what might happen when the audience bashes you for it, that makes it impossible to do the job." Because an actor should be playing a character, not an assigned persona.

Not being afraid of flaws can also mean the courage and ability to seek challenges. Sunshine By My Side was Xiao Zhan's first time performing in an urban profession drama. The reason he took this role was simple: modern dramas are very close to reality, since they're about everyday life. That actually makes it harder to deliver a believable performance. Because he had no assurance of success, he became convinced that if he could do it, it would be a valuable learning experience. That's how Sheng Yang came to be.

In filming Sunshine By My Side, Xiao Zhan learned that urban dramas are really reliant on how well the actors work together. Because they're more down to earth, nothing is set in stone, and both dialogue and performances are subject to adjustment.

"We're all living beings, we don't exist to maintain some persona. What we do, what we say, the emotions we express, it's all natural, logical, fluid. If you change something, my performance will change to match," Xiao Zhan says. This creative coupling meant that the actors could not be pedantic and mechanical, so it became a new and fun experience.

Whether modern or costume, Xiao Zhan has always had a clear-headed perspective on choosing scripts and characters. "Quality is always rare. That's why everyone says you can't look for it, it finds you," he says, based on what he's observed in the last while. "Some scripts, the industry might view them highly, but when the show airs the market response might not be that positive. How are we defining 'good'? Is it popularity, or acclaim? It's hard to say."

So all he can do is fall back on his own understanding and instincts, to choose what he thinks is best. As for what he wants to try, Xiao Zhan says, "I've been saying it for years, a lovable and charming rogue*, if there is an opportunity."

*["lovable and charming rogue" is a Chinese internet meme, originating from a line spoken by Tojiro/James of Team Rocket when introducing himself in the Pokemon anime.]

Xiao Zhan says he's a homebody. If he has free time, other than resting, he'll work out or watch a movie. He's never seen watching movies as a chore and will watch anything regardless of genre, whether it's a blockbuster or arthouse film. Recently, he watched Anatomy of a Fall which won the Palme d'Or at the 2023 Cannes Film Festival.

He often rewatches Love Actually around new year's, about once every three years or so. The reason is simple - the familial and romantic love and friendships are wonderful and heart-warming.

As for his hopes for himself, Xiao Zhan had an even simpler answer: "I did a pretty good job in 2023. Hopefully I can keep that up." After a bit more thought, he added: "in 2024, I'd like to love myself a bit more, and give more space to my own feelings and thoughts. That's not only my own resolution - that's my hope for everyone else too."

For Xiao Zhan, the "him" on screen is distinct from his own life. In private, he doesn't spend a lot of time dolling himself up, or wear any spectacular, eye-catching clothes. In everything he reaches toward what is natural and truthful.

"Like for our conversation, just maintaining this kind of comfortable state. I'm not going to put on another face, play another person," Xiao Zhan says. "That would be exhausting. Exhausting." He says it twice.

Like the poet wrote, "my heart may encompass the entire universe." Outside Xiao Zhan's boundaries, there's the delineation of borders, and the wide expanse of the universe.